How To Show You Mean Business (Vote with your MONEY)

In 1989, an Exxon tanker, known as the Valdez ran aground in Alaska. The resulting disaster was one of the worst the U.S. had ever seen. Consumers were outraged. They cut their Exxon credit cards in two and sent them to the company. A week or two later, the C.E.O. Lawrence Rawl said, "In ten years, you'll see nothing." And in response to consumer outrage, he said that we would forget. He was half right. The effects on the Alaskan tundra are very much still felt today.

But Exxon didn't fold over it…the conglomerate is still in business. Exxon bought Mobil and is stronger than ever. But me? I didn't forget. I haven't bought gas at an Exxon since the day the oil was spilled. It wasn't that the spill happened, I get that "accidents happen." It was the half-assed way the company went about cleaning it, and the years-long litigation in trying to get the damages reduced. For over 20 years now, they have been taking it back to court, and reducing what was awarded in order to avoid being held financially responsible for the mess they made. Most of America forgot. But I did not. No Exxon, no Mobil.

Enter BP and the ongoing cluster!@#$ taking place in the Gulf of Mexico. Continually downplaying the amount of oil being spewed, BP has been pussy-footing around this mess since it happened. Executives are as distant as they can be. They claim they can't stop the oil that is gushing from the pipeline. And maybe not. But until we see the BP big-wigs standing knee-deep in muck with a toothbrush in one hand, and a bottle of Dawn dishwashing liquid in the other, I will not believe they are, "Doing all we can." And as such, I choose to vote with my dollars, yet again. I am not buying gas from ARCO. I will not be patronizing AM/PM and I will steer clear of Castrol motor oil. All of these are owned by British Petroleum.

BP is known for over 8,000 disasters in the last twenty years. And what has been done about it? Isn't it time to say NO to profits over people? I think so.

Will it make a difference to BP? Perhaps not. But it makes a difference to me. Almost 20 years ago, George W. Bush made a mess of handling the Exxon oil spill. This time, President Obama will hold the perpetrators accountable. And so will I.

How about you?

T, who figures it should mean something

Send Chocolate Now but not to my dog

Today found me, at 5:30 in the morning, lying sleepless, waiting for my dog to die. I listened to her breathe, and prayed it wasn't Parvo. For those who don't know, Parvo is an extremely serious disease in puppies. Attacking the digestive system, it causes bloody diarrhea and vomiting. It hits hard, it hits fast, and it has about a 70% survival rate. Puppies that are unvaccinated mostly die. Puppies that are vaccinated can still get it; Poppy is finished with her vaccinations. There is no cure, once the dog develops the disease. Hospitalization, I.V. hydration and antibiotics are about all that can be done. Then nature takes its course.

I remember when I was a kid, my brother had an amazing boxer puppy my dad brought home from a friend. The pup was about 5 months old, and developed parvo. It was horrific. He couldn't stand, he was shaking, bloody poop and vomiting a foul brown liquid. He was gone within 12 hours. So, with Parvo, time is of the essence, and I was panicked, waiting for the vet to open. I didn't want to overreact, but I was concerned. Earlier in the night, Poppy had very loose poops. On the kitchen floor. Then, the pup who has been sleeping through the night woke up twice, once at 3:30 a.m. to poop and again at 5:30 a.m. She didn't make it outside that time, she just couldn't hold it. Lethargic and not very hungry, she just laid on the floor.

At one point, she was sleeping so soundly that she didn't look like she was alive. I revisited that moment of horror I used to feel when I brought my newborn home for the first time, would wake up and think, in a blind panic, "The baby is not breathing!" Crib death was a huge fear for me. The fact that I had a friend with a newborn who died of S.I.D.S. made the possibility even more real to me. But, of course, they baby was always breathing, it was just hard to tell sometimes.

Enter today. I called my puppy's name, and she didn't respond. I fought nausea and panic, and shook her, and she slowly raised her head, looking at me blearily.

I called the vet, as soon as they were open, and we headed down there. It's a bit of a trip from here, but at that point, Poppy had perked up a bit, and I wasn't quite as worried. The vet did a test for parvo, for gardia (a parasite) and for cocchia. She was negative for parvo, and for gardia. Still waiting to hear about cocchia. In the meantime, we are resting her digestive system and she isn't happy with me, because she isn't able to eat. I gave her some of the broad-spectrum antibiotic that the vet gave us for her, and she seems to be doing a lot better.

I questioned what caused her stomach upset: new foods, a trip to the dog park, stress.

The mystery was solved when JBear found a small, finger-sized bag of mini m&m's that were mostly gone. Aha! Chocolate is anathema to dogs. It is toxic, due to the theobromine in it. They can get very sick, and even die from getting into chocolate. And I had been soooo careful, but we think she found this bag wedged in between the cushions of the chair. We have no idea when she would have eaten it, because she is watched constantly. But eat it, she did.

While I recognize that I probably seemed like a paranoid first time mama, I am still glad I took her in. Absolutely better safe than sorry when it comes to puppies. She is feeling better, still a bit droopy. And.. $250 later, that was one expensive bag of m&m's.

And how was your day?

T, who has all chocolate up high on a shelf

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She's a tough little nut to crack

"Mama, I don't LIKE it!" My JBean wasn't happy. Although this is not that uncommon, it was still a concern. The Nutcracker was coming up, and she is due to perform.

Last year, she was a flower. "I liked being a flower mama. Flowers are graceful, and princess-y. It was a pretty dance." This year, they are lambs. She is less-than-thrilled.
"I hate the Lamb Dance! It's stupid. The costume is silly, I look like a little kid." I figured reminding her that is indeed what she is? Not so helpful.

Early on, I told her she didn't have to dance if she didn't want to. The Stage Mother? I am the furthest thing from that person. You won't see me pushing my children against their will. I have a theory about extra-curricular activities: if it isn't fun, what's the point? This may be because I was, if not born with two left feet, in possession of them now. Dancing well is hard for me, and I don't have autism. Still, if I were to try to dance, with actual choreography, you would think I was having a seizure of some sort.

I have given her every opportunity to bow out gracefully. She won't be a prima ballerina; she is still in the first-level class. All of her friends have pretty much moved up a level. She just isn't ready. As a parent, my heart hurts just a little bit for her. I worry as she gets older, girls will make fun of her. But she won't quit. She assures me that she wants to dance. And she does. She just doesn't love this dance. Still, she is trying, and that's all we can ask. To me, that in itself is a victory.

Now I am looking for a triumph over the fear I have for her. The great, white-hot worry that wakes me at night. I think of the time that is coming, soon, or not-so-soon, when the girls look at her and laugh. When they look at her, whispering behind their hands. When it hits her just how behind she is, and that without 10,000 hours, she just isn't going to get those dance solos that she may be wanting. She will be tried, and found less than adequate. And though we cannot keep our children from pain, it is still a very difficult thing to watch. A lump in my throat and tears pricking my eyes, I wait.

T, who loves her little lamb

Wolfram Alpha you aren't off to a very good start

I am a big fan of new tech. And I know that new stuff often has bugs that need to be worked out. But when I hit Wolfram Alpha, the new computational search engine last week for the first time, I was disappointed. Yes, it's an ongoing project, and needs others to contribute, but this? Floored me.

This is a screen capture of the word, "autism" in the search window, and the results found. (first I put in autism rates world and it came up with nothing) You can click on the image to enlarge, but the text is as follows:

(n) autism ((psychiatry) an abnormal absorption with the self; marked by communication disorders and short attention span and inability to treat others as people

With 1 in 150 kids dealing with autism, and the fact that you can throw a rock in tech communities and hit someone who either has a kid with autism or knows a kid with autism? THIS result? Is unacceptable. What, are we in the 18th century?

Next thing you know, it will be all about the refrigerator mothers again! Yes autism was once thought of as a psychiatric disorder, not a medical one. It was the mother's fault, she just didn't show her children enough love and compassion...she was cold. This is the old, outmoded thinking that was thrown out decades ago. Autism is classified as a neurological disorder and a developmental delay. It has nothing whatsoever to do with parenting. I? Am a kick-ass parent. You can ask my friends. You can ask my kids. It clearly wasn't anything we did. It. just. is. Time to stop blaming the parents.

Want to let Wolfram know that this kind of search result and definition is abhorrent in the 21st century? Send feedback.

While you're at it, send email to Princeton as well. It would seem that is where this ridiculous definition of autism originated.

T, who was dumb-founded and will stick to Google

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