Ready, Willing And Maple

You Want To Be Canada's Next Prime Minister?

Want to be Canada’s next leader? Then get aboard this reality TV show – before the December 15 deadline! It’s called `The Next Great Prime Minister. Ex-prime ministers Brian Mulroney, John Turner, Joe Clark and Kim Campbell will be judges on the Canadian Broadcasting Corp.'s show. Comedian Rick Mercer will host the one-hour special in which the former prime ministers will grill five finalists before a live audience on March 18. According to CNN, the ex-leaders and members of the audience will then have an equal vote to pick the winner. The winner of ``The Next Great Prime Minister'' will receive a $44,000 cash prize and paid internships in corporate and government organizations.

Rudolph Wants Some Rain, Dear

Nope, There Ain't No Snow Here In Australia

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

I took this shot on Waverley Road this afternoon, just as the mercury touched a scorching 36 degrees. The bright Christmas banner you see here is on the boundary fence of the East Malvern Cricket Club (established in 1922). Slap-bang in the middle of the frame is a gum tree and in the background, on the other side of the oval are several other gums and native trees. You can't see the grass on the oval, but the bright green has been transformed into much lighter turf - evidence of the heat and Melbourne's tough water restrictions. And while the rest of the world shivers in winter, tomorrow is the official start of the Australian summer.

Fright At The End Of The Tunnel

Lisbon Driver Was Stopping All Stations

A Lisbon driver took a wrong turn and headed down a subway tunnel in Portugal's second-largest city yesterday. According to the San Jose Mercury News, the driver, who was alone in his vehicle and was said to be in his fifties, veered down a ramp for emergency vehicles. He drove about 500m on the tracks, forcing operators to halt trains in the tunnels. Emergency services towed the vehicle out of the tunnel, back to where it belonged on the road.

Afterthought No.1: Just hope the driver was not my friend Terry (aka El Tel). Maria, if it was indeed Terry after a big night on the sauce, let me know and I'll bail him - or put him on a train!

Afterthought No.2: Maybe the guy was just an errant Roads Scholar.

Poker Phase

What's The Deal, Dude?

Photograph copyright: DAVID MCMAHON

I took these shots last month, just when these flowers, called red-hot pokers, were at their best in a little park beside the overpass on Kingsway, South Melbourne. I shot about nine or ten frames, but for some reason this is the one I like best. Why? Probably because this shows the entire range of orange and yellow across the bloom, the other pokers in the background to the right and the green and grey-blue of tree and sky above.

Prince Harming

Healthy, Wealthy (And Very Wise)

Very funny comment received from Toronto-based Rene. Reacting to my post Till Debt Do Us Part on 25 November, about the world's richest fictional characters, Rene chuckled at the fact that she gets daily emails from the fictional Nigerian prince. And this is what she said: ``Oh to be a girl again and have a real Prince Charming offer to share his wealth and not mine''.

Faster Than A Speeding Pullet

Don't Be Chicken If You Live On Lois Lane

It's a bird. It's a plane. Or is it a pizza? With Superman Returns about to be released on DVD, Papa John's, a US pizza place, is offering a free pizza to anyone who lives on the nation's Lois Lanes. According to wjbc.com, the company is launching the Superman Pan pizza promotion in Metropolis, the southern Illinois town that calls itself the adopted home of the superhero. There are more than 400 US cities with a Lois Lane. Residents can order online at papajohns.coms - or they can change in a phone box and fly in to pick up their order.

Disc Shockey

The Spine Who Loved Me

Want to slouch? Go ahead. The latest research suggests that we would be far better off slouching and slumping. Today’s advice, reports The Times, is to let go and recline. A team of radiologists has found that sitting up straight puts unneccesary strain on the spine and could cause chronic back pain because of trapped nerves or slipped discs. The ideal angle for office workers who sit for long periods is about 135 degrees. It might make working at a computer impractical but it will put less pressure on the spine than a hunched or upright position. Sounds lilke the recline and fall of the roamin' empire.

Basket Cases

That's A Lot Of Hot Air Before Sunrise, Innit?

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

Just before sunrise today, I came off a freeway ramp leading into the CBD and came to a halt at a traffic light. I was fiddling with the radio settings when I looked to my right and suddenly did a double-take as I noticed these five hot-air balloons floating silently in the sky. Not the best position for me. I did not have enough time to get out of the car. And I had a van to my right. I knew I had at least ninety seconds before the light changed. Lunged into the back seat. Grabbed the camera bag. Switched the Pentax on. No time to check the settings. Lined up the balloons. Took the shot - out of the driver's window, with my seat belt still on. Had time for two more frames very quickly, but they were not as good as this one - simply because of the colours of the sky. And you know what? The van (in silhouette here on the right) actually puts the skyline in perspective, with the whalebone roof of Rod Laver Arena to the left. Pure luck. I'm so glad I always have a camera with me. Keeps me, ahem, focused.

Late Reaction Number One: I should have chanted ``Van go, van go,'' to invoke the famous Dutch painter and use the power of my mind (such as it is) to urge the nearby van out of the camera's focus.

Late Reaction Number Two: This post is for my friend and colleague Merrilyn, who always tells me she knows a lot about hot air, er, no, I mean hot-air balloons!

Staring Down The Barrel

Cannon Restorer Brings Out The Big Guns

A 19th-century US military cannon is getting a real makeover, thanks to a Rolls-Royce mechanic who is also a local historian. The 130-year-old cannon has been a long-time fixture in downtown Berea, near Cleveland. The Cincinatti Enquirer reports that the cannon is sitting dismantled in Jim Jaworski's shop, along with two Bentleys, three Rolls-Royces and a 1953 Ford pickup (ute, if you're an Aussie). The American Legion has launched a fund-raiser to pay for its restoration. The plan is to put the cannon in Berea's Memorial Day parade next May.

Santa Pause

Never Mind The Past, Wot About Da Presents?

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

I took this shot at Bracebridge, Muskoka. If my memory is right, I was walking down Ecclestone Street towards the tourism office - but I'm sure Allan Cook will correct me if I'm leading you up the garden path, literally and metaphorically! I never actually got to Santa's Village, but the shot was too good an opportunity to miss. I guess it must have been put up by one of Santa's little helpers.

Country Erodes, Take Me Home

UK's `Naked' Roads Are Just Bare Essentials

They're experimenting with ``naked'' roads in Ipswich, England. No, they're not residential streets earmarked for nudists. They're roads that have been stripped of all traffic signs, signals, barriers and lines. According to The Houston Chronicle, it's part of a study to see if drivers proceed more cautiously on roads with only absolutely essential markings, which could help cut down on accidents in congested areas.

Empty Promise

Yup, There's A Message In This Bottle

An empty perfume bottle has sold at auction for $216,000. A New Jersey woman received the Lalique perfume from her husband in 1939. He'd bought it for $50 at Saks Fifth Avenue. The woman, who is now in her nineties, had held onto the empty bottle and the box it came in. A perfume bottle expert told The Times of Trenton newspaper that only 50 of the Lalique bottles were made, and he only knows of another one that is still in existence.

Silver Meddle

Mate, The Cabs Are Fare Dinkum

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

A Silver Top cab - it doesn't get more typically Melbourne than that. But you're wondering why the company is called Silver Top when the roof is yellow? Historically, the company's taxis always had silver roofs, but about a decade ago the State Government of Victoria decided that all cabs would be painted yellow. It was a logical decision and the State Premier at the time explained that it would be easier for tourists to hail a cab if they were all the same colour - instead of looking for the signs on the roof of the cabs, that were all different colours at the time.

Money For Muffin And The Pick's For Three

They Love My MT `VV'

This from today's bestseller list, publised in `The Statesman'. Look where `VV (Vegemite Vindaloo) is placed! Rather good company, methinks.

FICTION
1. The Inheritance Of Loss : A Novel - Kiran Desai, Rs 395.00
2. The Innocent Man - John Grisham, Rs 268.00
3. Vegemite Vindaloo - David McMahon, Rs 295.00
4. The Afghan - Frederick Forsyth, Rs 268.00
5. Cat O'Nine Tales - Jeffrey Archer, Rs 276.00

Till Debt Do Us Part

`Daddy' Warbucks On Top Of The Rich List

So you want to know who the world's richest fictional characters are? Look no further than the recent list released by Forbes.com with Oliver ``Daddy'' Warbucks replacing Santa Claus (No.1 in 2005) at the top of the list. Warbucks is, of course, from the comic strip `Orphan Annie' and is rarely seen in public without his bodyguards Punjab and Asp. At No. 2 on the list is the dastardly Montgomery Burns, followed by Scrooge McDuck, Richie Rich and Jed Clampett to round off the top 5. At No.9, one spot above Thurston Howell III is Prince Abakaliki of Nigeria. Never heard of him? Then chances are, you're one of a handful of people in the world never to receive an email from him, seeking to share his inherited millions with you. Ring a bell?

Amitabh Bachchan And My Brothers

All The World's A Stage At Sherwood College

This school photograph, taken in 1958, of the Senior Cambridge class at Sherwood College, Naini Tal, has apparently been doing the rounds on the internet with the subject field ``Guess which one is Amitabh Bachchan’’. It was sent to an old family friend, Leslie Mukerjea (nee Hartnett), a former Miss India who competed in the 1974 Miss International pageant in Tokyo. (As a sporting aside, Leslie is married to former Wimbledon competitor Chiradip Mukerjea, who won a bronze medal at the 1978 Asian Games in Bangkok, Thailand).

Leslie immediately spotted a familiar face in the photograph – my brother Keith, 15 years older than me. Struck by the coincidence, she immediately forwarded the email to my brothers and me. My older siblings, Keith, Michael and Brian all went to Sherwood College, whereas I went to North Point, Darjeeling instead.

Just for the record, the famous actor is the image on the left; my brother Keith is the student pictured on the right. And I must point out that among the many photo albums in our family, we have historic pictures of Amitabh and Keith on stage together, in a Sherwood College production of the play `And Then There Were None’. We even have a poster from the play; I think Keith was one of the school artists who helped produce the poster.

The link goes a bit further, because Amitabh’s brother Ajitabh was in the same Sherwood class as my brother Brian. Another classmate of theirs was a certain Kabir Bedi, who made a name for himself not only in Bollywood, but in Hollywood as well. If memory serves me right, he even played a role in the famous TV soap opera `Days Of Our Lives'. I’m sure each of those classmates has an interesting story or two to tell about the others!

And this other picture, displayed on the left, shows Amitabh (seated, left - but you knew that, didn't you) at a recent Sherwood College reunion. The lady beside him, in the sari, is my sister-in-law, Linda. Behind them in the dark blue suit and red tie, is my brother Michael, a highly decorated fighter pilot and vice chief of the Indian Air Force.

I'm not entirely sure if another distinguished former student, Field Marshal Sam Manekshaw, was present at the reunion. Must have been an amazing school, Sherwood College.

Me Tarzan, You Chain

Railing Against The System

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

Where's the best spot to park your bike when you're in a hurry? Tethered to the railings, as close to the sign that commands you NOT to park your bicycle there. I was walking around Montreal, in the area known as The Plateau - when I spotted this incongruous sight. My French isn't the best in the world, but even I know that the warning ``Pas De Bicyclette'' probably means ``Don't be a cheeky sod and park your bike here''. And if you're in any doubt, the graphic on the sign shows clearly that it's not acceptable to park a bike there. The light wasn't the best, but by crikey, the picture just had to be taken.

Golden Grate

And Now, A Word From Our Sponsors!

The managers of San Francisco's landmark Golden Gate Bridge are considering accepting corporate sponsorships. According to kesq.com, bridge officials have hired a company to explore the money-making potential of the world-famous span. They said there would be no neon signs or billboards. Despite toll increases, the famous bridge has been operating in the red.

Ingot We Trust

Open-And-Shutter Case On Golden Pond

Photograph copyright: ALLAN COOK

What can you say when somene sends you a picture as good as this? Folks, it is my very great pleasure to introduce the great Muskokan, Allan Cook. He's an all-round good bloke, marketing manager of Muskoka Tourism and he sings with the Muskoka Men of Song (he's going to complain bitterly about that revelation) and he loves this amazing part of Ontario, Canada, as much as I do. I'll let him tell the story of this great photograph. In his words, then ...

``It was taken over seven years ago on a trip through Algonquin Park. We'd been following (by canoe) the trail of ghost towns left in the park from the years when the Canadian National Railway wound its way through the park's northern reaches and the lumber industry was booming. We had started out from campground among the remnants of the once prosperous town of Kiosk, and this was taken on Cauchon Lake on our first night of the five-day trip.

``I had recently been bitten by the shutter bug, and had just bought a second-hand SLR and I'd brought it along on the trip. We were treated to fantastic sunsets almost every night, and this first one was an especially brilliant shade of gold. I had been trying to capture it and our canoe in a shot together, and had been playing around with all sorts of settings to try to get it right. I toyed with the shutter speed, I fiddled with the aperture, and I wrote down which settings I used on which shots. For one shot, I accidentally forgot to turn off the flash, and I noted `NG (no good) - Forgot flash on'. Of course, that no good photo is the one you're looking at. None of the rest turned out. Thanks again for this honour!''

Barmy Harmy

That Delivery Musta Been The Policeman's Ball

Has there ever been a shoddier first delivery in a Test match? I think Steve Harmison is a wonderful bowler who has a great future for England, but come on, did he bowl that first delivery of the Ashes series in Brisbane today to the batsman - or to second slip? I think even the Barmy Army were gobsmacked by that delivery. Let me know what you think. Maddi, you listenin'? Mudar, Mark, Binks and Harsha, are you blokes paying attention? Add your comments here and tell me what you think ....