Some of my "Life" Books

So there's a "Top 10 Books" meme floating around FB right now.  One of my friends from high school tagged me when she shared her Top 12, and I followed her lead on flexing the rules a bit :)  Sharing the list here, along with some chatter:

1. Bible - pretty self explanatory.  "My" first official copy was a white hardback with a painting of Jesus on the front.  I believe it was the Good News version - but mostly I remember the stickers in the back (earned during Sunday School). Current version is NIV/Message Parallel.
2. Experiencing God (Blackaby) - I did this study when D was only a few months old.  We met in a friend's home, and there were something like 12 of us ladies and over 30 kids under the age of 6. Yeah.  But despite the insanity, this study grabbed onto my heart.  And I swear that I'd never heard Hebrews 12:7-11 before.
3. Fit to be Tied (Hybels) - someone (I think it might have been one of the librarians I worked with in college?) gave me this book shortly after the now-hubby & I became engaged.  He was 22 and I was 21, and we were engaged 15 months (it seemed like an eternity!) Lots of excellent advice on what being married really means. Hmmm, think I may need to pull it out again, now that I think about it.
4. Professionalizing Motherhood (Savage) - I worked in the "corporate world" seven years before leaving to become a full-time Mom. I was excited about that transition, but also weirdly adrift/disappointed because I no longer had measurements of productivity. This was a book that helped me adjust my perspective, and I've recommended it repeatedly to other new moms.
5. The Search for Significance (McGee) - I first learned of this book during high school and read part of it, then in college (after changing my major to Psychology) I finished working through it (the author is the founder of Christian counseling center). Picked up the updated version when pregnant with our son, and it was still an excellent read.
6. Trim Healthy Mama (Barrett, Campbell) - I was introduced to this a year ago, but it's absolutely a life changer. So thankful to feel positive about the direction I'm headed physically!
7. The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe (Lewis) - I honestly can't remember a time I didn't love books, but I DO vividly thinking I hated anything that was sci-fi or fantasy, but this book changed my perspective. My parents purchased the Narnia box set on a Scholastic order in 3rd grade for $20 (we didn't normally order from there, and I can remember being shocked that my parents would spend that much money). I still have that box set, and it is very worn (I still remember being very angry with my brother when he read them and didn't treat them with the proper respect).
8. The Secret Garden (Burnett) - another childhood favorite. I received a beautifully bound copy of this book as a Christmas gift from an aunt & uncle, and I had not even heard of it.  I remember being somewhat confused when I started reading, but was soon drawn into the story. Dark and gothic, yet corny & uplifting.
9. Deadline (Alcorn) - read shortly after we were married, and I was surprised that a Christian novel could be so well-written, and I also found my comfortable existence shaken up a bit.  I've read several of Alcorn's other books, and I was torn whether to include this one or Safely Home (I chose the one that was published earlier).
10. What Alice Forgot (Moriarty) - an amazing novel that I read two years ago because I was sick of seeing it on so many "You Really Should Read This!" lists. And know what, you should! Although not a Christian novel, it made me stop and think about how many blessings I take for granted...
11. Threads of Change Trilogy (Baart) - I just discovered these amazing books this year, and have recommended them to several friends.  Christian novels that aren't afraid to tackle hard issues and don't provide trite answers, but a beautiful depiction of grace.
12. Snuggle Puppy (Boynton) - Yes, this is a board book.  I read this to both kids and made up my own song. I can still sing it - and both kids occasionally request it. "The way I feel about you is a kind of a song..."

It was so difficult to narrow this down, as I do love me some books. Anne of Green Gables, Little House on the Prairie, several series by Janette Oke, If God Loves Me Why Can't I Get My Locker Open?, I'm Glad I'm a Woman, A Grief Observed, Addicted to Mediocrity, Outland comics (better known as Opus & Bill) - as well as Calvin & Hobbes and later Baby Blues, Naked Fruit (about the fruits of the spirit - ha!), Good Girls Don't Have to Dress Bad, Life Artist, Storybound... 

Oh, how awesome to lose oneself in a well-written story, or find yourself changed by a few well written sentences!

On that note, I do believe I shall share this tidbit from the book currently on my nightstand, God's Heart for You:

Real friends tell you when you have something in your teeth. They love you enough to speak the truth, and Jesus is our most faithful friend of all. He sees deep within our hearts and tells us when something is stuck there that doesn't belong. His correction always comes with grace, not condemnation.  ~Holley Gerth

Living with Less - and a giveaway!

Today I'll be sharing a bit about the newly released book Living with Less so your Family has More by Jill and Mark Savage. I think we all struggle to balance the many aspects of life, and obviously finances play a huge role in that. Read on for more info - and a chance to win a copy for yourself!!

Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

We have been married for 27 years…17 of them happily. After finding ourselves in a marriage counselor’s office around year 8 or so, we realized that we really didn’t know how to be married. We worked hard to turn things around and now we like to share that hope with other couples.

We have five children ranging from 13 to 25. Our oldest three are married. Anne (25) and her husband, Matt, live in Zion, IL, and are expecting our first grandchild in April. (We are very excited!) Evan (22) and his wife, Julie, have been married a year and a half and they live just a few miles from us. Erica (19) married her husband Kendall last September. They live in Augusta, GA, and wherever else the Army takes them.

We have two teenagers still at home. Kolya just turned 16. He’s learning to drive and we’ve nearly worn a hole in the carpet on the floor in the passenger seat trying to find that non-existent brake pedal. Kolya is the newest member of the Savage family. We adopted him at the age of nine from Russia.

Austin is 13 and in the 8th grade. He wants us to make sure and tell the world that this “living with less” life is a real bummer because he’s the ONLY kid in 8th grade who doesn’t have a cell phone.

Tell us about your newest book Living With Less So Your Family Has More?

The world screams the message that bigger is always better, but we have found that is not often true. When it comes to raising a family, less materially can actually result in more relationally. Children don’t need the best houses, the best lessons, the best cars, or the best clothes. What they really need is the best home life and the best family relationships we can give them.

Why did you want to write this book?

We didn’t start out with the “less is more” mindset. We started as a double income family wanting to have the “best” of everything. Then Mark decided to pursue ministry. We went from the “high life” to the “frugal life” very quickly as we moved to another state for him to go to Bible College full-time.

That experience introduced us to the concept that less is more. We definitely had less money, but we had more time. We had less stress and more peace. We had less activities and more fun.

Since that experience, we’ve continued to live primarily on one income for the past twenty years. We’ve had to battle cultural peer pressure and make different decisions for our family than many other families in our neighborhood have made. But we’ve never felt that we were materially depriving ourselves or our kids…instead we’ve focused on what we’ve actually been able to provide for them emotionally and relationally.

What do you hope your readers will gain from this book?

We hope the reader is encouraged to evaluate how they are living their life, spending their money, and thinking about family matters. Our goal is to introduce families to the “less is more” concept and then equip them with the attitudes and actions to actually make that happen.

For families that are already committed to less is more, we hope to bolster their resolve and help them stay focused on the long-term goal of providing relationally for their kids.

In today’s economy, there are many families being forced to live with less. We want to help them see the opportunity they have with this unexpected downsizing they’ve been forced to do.

And for those who have just been a little discontent with their life and saying things like, “I’m tired of the rat race of life,” or “Is there more to life than drive-thru meals for dinner?” we hope to help them see other choices they have and how they can lead their family in a different direction.

What unique elements will the reader find in Living With Less So Your Family Has More?

For couples who want to read the book together, we’ve included discussion questions at the end of every chapter. This helps move the readers to discussion and eventually actions. Even a single parent can use the discussion questions for personal evaluation.

Readers will find this book a practical guide to changing your attitude and your actions to live a successful “less is more” life. They’ll find our writing style to be a warm, casual, honest discussion where we not only share our victories but our mistakes along the way. We are an average couple living successfully on an average income who want to help others to see the possibilities before them.

This is a Hearts at Home book. What is Hearts at Home?

Hearts at Home is an organization that encourages, educates, and equips women in the profession of motherhood. Hearts at Home encourages moms through annual conferences, our extensive website (www.hearts-at-home.org), a free electronic newsletter, a radio program, and an entire line of books designed to meet the needs of moms all over the world!

Any closing thoughts?

It’s healthy for parents to occasionally pause and evaluate their vision for their family and the choices they are making. We hope this resource will help them do that together and that it will lead them to live a life of little regret.

- - - -

Would you like to win a copy for yourself? Please leave a comment (include your email addy, please) by Monday 3/29 (1:00 PM central) and I'll have my daughter draw a name. Sorry, but US addresses only since I'm paying for shipping :)

Growing Grateful Kids

Today I have the honor of introducing the new book from Susie Larson - Growing Grateful Kids. This is something that's really been on my heart lately, and I'm so excited to find this resource. Please read on to learn more about Susie and this great book --

Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

My husband and I have been married 25 years and have three grown sons (all in their early twenties). Our oldest son Jake works on the business side of the Christian music industry. Our middle son Luke is married to his beautiful wife Kristen; he works full time at a bank and part time as a worship pastor. Our youngest son Jordan is studying to become a surgical nurse. My husband Kevin is a commercial construction manager by day and manages my ministry by night (and weekends). Bless his heart! I am an author, speaker, and an on-call radio host for Christian talk radio. Together, Kevin and I serve as advocates for justice on behalf of modern day slaves and human trafficking victims.

Tell us about your new book, Growing Grateful Kids: Teaching Them to Appreciate an Extraordinary God in Ordinary Places.

Even when economic times are tight, our children enjoy an abundance of material possessions. Yet, amidst all this wealth, discontentment and competition seem to be on the rise. Instead of teaching children virtues such as gratefulness and patience, many parents are bending over backwards to get their children the latest and greatest item - or feeling guilty when they can't. In spite of the currents of materialism and entitlement that flow so strong, it is possible to raise children who are simply grateful. Though teaching perspective and gratitude to our children is critical, it is not difficult.

Why did you want to write this book?

To be completely honest, I never wanted to write a book on parenting. I wanted to protect my kids’ privacy and give them time and space to become the men God wants them to be. But in the last few years, I have been especially burdened with the level of selfishness, entitlement and disrespect I see among children today. Furthermore, moms seem more stressed than ever. When I asked my sons their thoughts on writing this book, without pausing they all said, “Do it, mom; that book needs to be written!” I think I wrote a book that not only equips young moms to raise humble, grateful world-changers, but also one that nourishes the soul of the reader and encourages her personally.

Throughout the book you remind the reader that we cannot impart what we do not possess. Can you explain?

If we never deal with our own fears, insecurities, and hang ups, but we try to teach our children to believe in their divine value, over time, our words will not ring true to them. First God wants to do His work in us before He does it through us. They say that lessons are more often caught than taught. If we parent from a place of conviction and real freedom, our children will be affected by what we teach them.

One of your chapters is titled, “Take Time to Play.” How does taking time to play teach our kids to be grateful?

To me, taking time to play says a lot about the level of faith we possess.

If our children hear us confess that we love and serve a BIG God and yet they see us striving and straining through life, they will come to believe that more is on our shoulders than on God’s. If we can trust God enough to step away from our busy-important lives, to make a fort in the basement, or play a game with our children – even in the most desperate of economic situations – we will give our children a sense of much needed security and that all is well in their world.

What do you want readers to take away from this book?

To answer this question (I hope you don’t mind), I would like to share an endorsement from one of my sample readers. She expressed my deepest desire for my reader:

“Growing Grateful Kids is such a great source of conviction, encouragement, and inspiration to spur me on to finishing this parenting race well and not sputter out along the way. This book compels me to submit my own character to the refining of the Holy Spirit that I may be equipped to impart those lessons onto my children. Thank you, Susie, for taking the time, for submitting in obedience, and writing this down for a generation in desperate need of this kind of parenting book!” –Gail Miller

This is a Hearts at Home book. What is Hearts at Home?

Hearts at Home is an organization that encourages, educates, and equips women in the profession of motherhood. Hearts at Home encourages moms through annual conferences, our extensive website (www.hearts-at-home.org), a free bi-weekly electronic newsletter, a radio program, and an entire line of books designed to meet the needs of moms all over the world!


Any closing thoughts?

I am very excited about the message in this book. It is my prayer that every one who reads it will be nourished, encouraged, and equipped to parent from a place of fullness, conviction, and confidence. Raising grateful, confident kids will be one of the most heroic, important things you do in your lifetime. God’s blessings to you!

Book Review - Intimate Conversations

I had the privilege of reviewing Intimate Conversations, the new book from Alicia Britt Chole, which also happens to be the MOPS theme devotional for 2009. When I received it, I thumbed through, reading a few random sentences. And I was hooked. Even in a cursory perusal, I was thinking about my life - and my relationship with my Savior - differently. I liked the way the book was summarized over at christianbook.com: All women need strong relationships but the one that most often gets neglected in the busyness of the day is God himself. In Intimate Conversations, you'll find an encouraging God whose grace does not stop with our imperfection or exhaustion. Amen!

The book is broken out into 12 "Dear God..." sections, and each has 4 or 5 devotionals - perfect to work through in a week. They each open with a little story, and include a key verse and questions for pondering/journaling. They're quick to read, but provide plenty of food for thought, and made me want to dig deeper into my Bible. The "Dear God... I Feel So Unproductive" section really spoke to my heart, and I think it will resonate with stay-at-home moms. A few of my favorite quotes:

• Abundance may make us feel more productive, but perhaps emptiness has greater power to strengthen our souls. (Ps 1:3)
• Anonymous seasons afford us the opportunity to establish God as our souls' true point of reference if we resist underestimating how he treasures our hiddenness and take the time to decide whose attention and acceptance really matters in our lives. (Col 3:3)

The book ends with "Dear God... Grant Me Wisdom For This Journey" and the final lesson reminds us to enjoy the journey - for "Life is not about the scenery. Life is all about the Company. God is with us. And his presence is enough."

I can tell you that I am looking forward to reading this again at a more leisurely pace. And I'm definitely going to be checking out her other writings.

Available September 2009 at your favorite bookseller from Revell, a division of Baker Publishing Group

What's up?!?

First off, I just want to thank everyone for their prayers. We've definitely felt them over these past several days. What a blessing to be able to rest in the arms of our Savior.

We had some beautiful weather over the weekend, so I've been reassured that spring really is coming :) We were able to play outside and I even grilled. Today is gray and dreary, so it's time to do laundry and some more sorting/purging.

Hubby made it safely home, and things are returning to some degree of normalcy. He's back at work, of course, but thankfully is off on Friday so we're definitely doing some sort of family outing thing. Also need to figure out what we're doing for our son's 5th birthday, which is coming VERY fast. I had held off on planning anything until we knew hubby's travel schedule - it now looks as though he won't be leaving for China until April, so we're going to try to squeeze in a little party.

In other news, our friend who was hospitalized last week does seem to be improving, although they don't have a lot of answers yet. Sadly, on Sunday I learned that another friend has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Thankfully it's early and the doctor is very optimistic, but obviously it's still difficult. I'm still doing a lot of praying.

Finally, I'd like to share a bit more from the book Naked Fruit, this time about spiritual growth.

"God tills the soil of our lives until we begin to grow qualities that resemble his nature. By his interest and effort in us, we grow into holy orchards. By our own efforts, based on our own natures, we'll grow fruit of the flesh. It might be nice, but it won't look like Jesus. It won't be naked fruit. Our best efforts won't grow godliness, because the fruit of the spirit comes forth only from godly seeds... Our job in spiritual growth is to cooperate with the gardener."

Elisa Morgan goes on to explain what cooperation looks like: we're receptive, we endure pruning, and we stay connected. Kind of reminds me of something another famous person once said:

“I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more. You have already been pruned and purified by the message I have given you. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me. Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing." ~Jesus (John 15:1-5, NLT)

Choosing Joy

We're having an interesting couple days - the kids are being really mean to one another, and I'm pretty sure that our daughter is getting sick (she's currently napping, which is definitely out of the ordinary). Learned of another death in the family. Started the process of getting that crown (so my mouth is now really sore) and also discovered we'd have to pay out of pocket rather and get reimbursed rather than paying directly out of our FSA account.

In the midst of it all, I've started re-reading Naked Fruit. I know it was used in MOPS, but it was before my time. Anyway, I finished the chapter on joy while I was eating lunch. Some thoughts to share:

"Happiness comes from the root hap, which means chance. Happiness is circumstantial. It has to do with life going the way we want it to go and the feeling we experience when that happens...

The fruit of joy is confidence in God. Joy is confidence in God's grace, despite circumstances - despite what happens. Joy is the ability to hold up because we know we are being held up. Joy is the conviction that God is in control of every detail of our lives even when those details appear to be out of control...

Naked joy is vulnerable... It's not about us getting what we want when we want it. It's about God and his character - and what we really believe about him... Naked joy reveals to us what we believe about God. Further, it reveals what we believe about God to those who are watching and wondering how we'll respond when life happens to let us down."

I made this frame last fall, as a reminder to keep things in perspective when things don't go "my" way. It's in the kitchen, where I see it daily. I have so much to learn.

What's my Goal?

After my not-so-great Monday, I decided it was time to reread Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel. I purchased this book when our son was just a few months old - I read it in bits and pieces while nursing him. I found it encouraging, easy to read, full of scripture and very practical. But frankly I wouldn't be dealing with most of those issues for a few years. So I read it and stashed it on my bookshelf. Had pulled it out a couple times to browse a particular chapter. But now I'm reading the whole thing. Let me share a passage that really touched me yesterday:

When it comes to having misplaced priorities, I'm definitely guilty! Much of the time, my goal in parenting is simply to have well-behaved children - not for some higher, godly purpose, but for my own peace and quiet. My life is so much simpler and more enjoyable when the kiddos obey me without arguing and when they get along with each other. As a result, I'm quick to correct them, sometimes in anger, when my comfort is disturbed, without considering how I'm modeling God to them...

It's vital that we step away from the pandemonium of parenting from time to time and remind ourselves of the true goal - to have kids who are drawing an accurate picture of God in their hearts and learning how to relate to Him as their creator each day.

Modeling God to our kids is a tall order, In fact, I would be the first to admit that my representation of God is imperfect. But that's the nature of a reflection. It's backward in a mirror, upside-down in a spoon, blurry in a window, and always one-dimensional. Though we should strive to be godly, we can never perfectly reflect God. Instead, our goal should be to ensure that our reflection of God draws our children closer to Him - and that it makes them long to touch the real thing.

Amen.

Ah, children...

Yesterday ended up being kinda crazy. I took the kids in to the doctor - they've had these colds for well over a month now, and on Sunday night our son started saying his ear hurt. Anyway, he DOES have an ear infection as well as a mild sinus infection. The pediatrician said that our daughter's symptoms looked more like allergies, so she's now on a twice daily Rx to see if that helps. Hopefully there will be less snottage and coughing at our house soon!!

On a funny note, this is how our daughter ended her day. She was wiped out, and asleep before 6:30. How on earth can someone fall asleep like that?!?

I've been reading the book Authentic Parenting in a Postmodern Culture by Mary DeMuth. Wonderful book - I'm only halfway through but am already recommending it to friends. I was reading it yesterday, as I was sitting at the pharmacy, and started chapter 7, which is about how we are a "window" for our children. It begins with this quote:

"It is our children who serve as the doorway we pass through to meet God face to face."

-Dan Allender

I know there's not any great theological truth in that statement, but it really made me stop and think. Am I looking at our kids as a way to grow closer to my Lord, or just another commitment? I've recently joked with people about our kids, how I sometimes just have to grit my teeth and remind myself that they are "our blessings from the Lord." Now parenting isn't all shiny and happy, but I've been having a hard time finding joy, as I deal with these two little people who each have their own (strong) ideas about how things should happen.

The next subtitle in the text is Children: God's Sanctification for Parents. Another phrase that stopped me short. How true!! As I parent, I have become vividly aware of my shortcomings. I used to consider myself a rather patient person - but then I had kids. Holy toledo! I've also realized just how selfish I can be, and how that manifests itself when I lash out in anger. And here's the thing about a window: it goes both ways. Are the kids growing closer to God as they watch me in action? Yes, we attend church and they have wonderful age-appropriate lessons. Yes, we read Bible stories and pray before bedtime. But am I demonstrating a godly attitude in my daily tasks? That's where it really counts, what they see on a day to day basis and what they'll remember.

Are these new ideas? Certainly not. Did I already know this? Absolutely! Am I doing it? Well, sort of...

Always good to check one's perspective.