The Taunting - Cheapass Edition - Dramatic Recreation

OK, I may be spectacularly late in posting the summary of the Taunting but my Terrible Tardiness is matched only by my Magnificent Single Mindedness - I just kept feeling like I couldn't move forward with anything else unless I could manage to finish this. It would be like admitting defeat in the face of things that kept happening in December. And then January. Things were beginning to threaten February too but I'm gonna show those pesky Things what's what.

Also, I realized that the holidays started for me in September and kept coming every single weekend until the first week of January. It was like an avalanche of Holidays. And when I got to the bottom of them I collapsed.

Whew. And now NEW holidays are happening - because time keeps moving forward. Which is, frankly, a little annoying. Things are happening for the big Hallmark Holiday coming up and it's not right to write about them without giving the last major holiday it's due.

So we left off (or more accurately I left you off) here.

Where I mentioned that since the Taunting had snuck up on me I didn't handle the display the way I usually did - so I did something else. Even more Tauntingly. It ended up that the makeshift wrapping system fit absolutely every present for every night. So I put all of the presents in two suitcases and every night before the candle lighting went upstairs wrapped the evenings clues . . .I mean presents into the scarves with the really cool paper that Uncommon Goods used instead of styrofoam and handed the tied scarves to the Children.

So every night sort of looked like some variation of this:

As you can see, the Poppets from Taunting 2008 were helping to supervise, and they were curious as to how a non-Poppet based taunting works.

So the First Candle had given the Girl recycled kimonos that held things together and the Boy got a timepiece that looked a bit like a spaceship had landed on his arm. It's in the link I put up above.

The Second Candle the Children both got bento boxes:

Bento boxes are magic, that's why the Tiny Wizard wanted to show them to you. The Ronin Panda is for the Girl and the "Lunch System Black Box" is for the Boy. The paper that is surrounding them is the wonderful un-styrofoam packing paper. Bentos end up being a really good way to keep your sandwiches from getting squished in your backpack. And you can pack salted cashews without having to use a lot of little ziplock baggies.

Using bento is green too.

Now there were two nights - the Children were not yet willing to hazard guesses.

You remember that there is always a theme right?

Third Candle came.

We lit the candles, sang the songs, and the Children opened their cheapass - I mean "green" wrapping on their gifts.

The Ninja is by the Nom Nom Nom insulated lunch bag, and Choco Poppet is by the Happy Bees lunch bag making sure that they each go to the right Child.

The Children were willing to hazard a guess that the themes had to do with food, but were slightly confused about how kimono based shoelaces fit in with that.

Fourth Candle came and then things changed up a bit - The Girl got a bag of Zen and the Boy got a Sonic Screwdriver and this really cool Tardis T-shirt.

Well neither of those things had anything to do with food. Now they were confused.

I should take this time to point out that one of the advantages Hanukah not having a Hanukah Fairy or anything similar means that when your Children are not quite childish anymore there is some room to maneuver. The Girl had wanted something that was artisan made and quite expensive and basically the equivalent of her entire Hanukah budget. So we obtained the artisan made thing for her with the understanding that it basically was her Hanukkah present - but you cannot stop the Taunting!

So she was Taunted regardless . . . which means she knew the gifts all led to something specific. And she started throwing out some ideas for the Boy's Theme, but wasn't willing to guess at hers. But gentle readers, you may start noticing a bit of a disparity in the gifts moving forward and I didn't want you to assume favoritism.

Fifth Candle - the Boy's gift is being shown by the Skeleton Who Wants to Run a Flower shop doing his impression of James Cameron.

It's a globe that floats - he's wanted a globe for some time.

The Girl got a handmade Peace bracelet made by Pammy J. So as you can see there are also nightly themes where their presents relate to each other and back to the bigger themes for each of them. So Fifth Candle was a gimme - It was World and Peace. Although the Poppets did point out that the Children hardly ever disagree with each other, but they didn't really seem like they could spread World Peace around.

I told the Poppets it was OK as long as they tried. And they managed to try it without using nuclear technology.

The Sixth Candle brought the Boy a Donegal Tweed hat with an Asian Dragon and the Girl got a Lucky Cat coin purse from Japan. Orange and Violet approved. They both figured that they weren't going to get it until Eight Candle at this point.

And on the Seventh Candle The Girl got a Djinn, trapped in a sweatshirt and the Boy got Time trapped in gears under glass. "But wait" you say. "Didn't he get a watch at the beginning of the Taunting". Why yes, yes he did. You see, we have all sorts of important milestones in out family for girls marked with a piece of real jewelry that can be kept or handed down to future generations. But there have been nothing BUT girls born into our family for four generations until the Boy. The jewelry given to the girls is to learn things about trust from your elders, taking care of things, learning the differences in material value and craftsmanship and maturity. We have markers for the first real ring, (usually engraved with an initial, that the child picks themselves at a real jewelry shop) when you can pierce your ears. (6th grade for me and the Girl - younger for my sister and my niece).

When the Girl turned 16 I gave her the gold necklace that my parents had given me on my 16th birthday. And when looking for the first sports watch I realized that there was no equivalent tradition or items for the Boy. Who was going to need a dress watch. So the First Candle was a sports Chronometer, but the Seventh Candle was a Sturhling Winchester Skeleton watch in Rose Gold. Because the Boy has excellent taste in Jewelry for others and he like to make things work.

It's a really cool watch.

And he also got a copy of Electronic Gadgets for the Evil Genius - 28 projects to build for yourself.

It's a great book, but some of the projects are actually illegal in some states, so build with caution.

And then finally it was The Eighth Candle - this is when the Big Presents are given.

The Girl's Eighth Candle was actually acquired in the summer, long before the negotiations over very expensive artisan made things. So all of the things she had received were actually the lead up to her receiving a Zen Poppet.

There are only 5.

I have one too, so we own 2/5 of all the Zen Poppets in the world. Someday I shall take a picture of them having tea together.

The Girl really needs some Zen, and Poppety Zen is the best kind of Zen.

The Boy has now reached the same height as me. I am not exactly short. And he has wanted a leather duster for a long time. I happen to have a leather duster. It hits us mid calf.

The thing the Children love about my duster is that it doesn't look fashionable, although it can be. It just looks like it's Mine. I've worn it to the desert, to the symphony, thrown it on the floor in open space rehearsals, worn it to Europe slept on it in tents in the rain. It's weathered. It's mine like the pointy hat is Elphaba's. It doesn't matter that they weren't originally made for us, once they were Ours there were no other defining characteristics. Oh that's the Witch's Hat. Oh that's Drinne's Leather Coat.

And ultimately, that's really what the Boy wanted for himself.

But my duster is black, and the Boy is not dark, and he is young. There are people who signify THINGS when they see young men in black leather dusters. And those are none of the THINGS that belong to the Boy. He is not interested in playing with other people's symbols.

So I found a vintage full length Dark Brown leather trenchcoat from London. Because it matters that it was long, not that it was black. and it looks smashing with the Donegal hat with the Asian Dragon and it has an inside chest pocket that is perfect for holding the Sonic Screwdriver. It's like it was meant to be. And now the Boy has exactly what he wants and doesn't look like anyone else.

I'm sure you've guessed the themes by now.

It only took about an hour for it to be His.

Which is the way it should be.

And that, finally, is the tale of the Taunting of 2009.

Better late than never.

The Ambassador's Cousin Arrives

Things have been going well at the Embassy. Perhaps they have been going a bit too well. Immigration ( completely legal of course) to the area had increased the Poppet based population of the city approximately 600% in a mere six months. The Ambassador had expected that he would be needed very rarely since there had been such a small population  and was looking forward to mixing with the locals. He had indeed purchased the neighboring blocks in order to fund redevelopment in the area. 

The Bilaterian Design Group was working with him to make the place a bit more like home and they had managed to make several areas bigger on the inside than the out, but it was slow and there was a great deal of math involved. Then of course there was the actual construction. Although there were many other beings from back home, he was really quite pleased when his cousin Prentice arrived.  Prentice was more of a Traveling Poppet and quite skilled in protocol and marketing. He has agreed to help the Ambassador with all of the inconvenient "putting yourself out there" decisions, and it didn't take him long to set his cousin straight.

He and the Ambassador walked around the neighborhood and took in the areas that were already in the beginning stages of being slightly more positive already. It was Poppet Friendly but still a way aways from being like Poppet Planet. Of course nothing could ever be quite like home, and one should appreciate the beauty of where one is as well. The Ambassador had said as much himself. 

Prentice delicately brought up the idea of bringing in a local to help take care of some of the Embassy's work and share in some of the hosting duties. He also suggested that maybe an Official Embassy and a different Ambassadorial residence wasn't really a showy thing to be embarrassed about but an excellent thing to help bring beings together. It would also allow the Ambassador to have a private place as well as a public one. 

The Ambassador was still not convinced on the second item but was very happy about the first. How does one go about finding an Attache locally?

Prentice however knew exactly who to ask and excused himself since he saw that very lady across the street in the park that was undergoing some temporal displacement work. 

The Ambassador went ahead to the Cafe which was also very much "in between" but had excellent sandwiches.

A quick consultation with Winter and a compliment to her dapper hat and Prentice returned to his cousin with a recommendation and a very specific name. "Alastair Lupin."

Well liked and respected in the area it seemed. The folk at the cafe shared their observations quietly with each other but the low murmmer was very positive. Mr. Lupin had a mysterious past, was a single father and spent a great deal of his free time with Spike discussing foreign policy and playing chess. 

Perhaps he had professional background as well? The Ambassador decided he would invite Mr. Lupin for a meeting to see if he was interested in the position. 

Of course he'd have to call the Stripes first. It was indeed a good thing his cousin was here. 

And also the Coffee at the Poppet Cafe was excellent. 

It was such good coffee that it almost made him more comfortable with the idea of having a staff. It wouldn't be ostentatious to have a staff if you could take your staff to the cafe. 

He did hope a staff of two would be sufficient.

It's about Food and Fire . . . .

Yesterday was "First Candle" which is the part of the Great Jewish Conspiracy when you light the first candle on the Channukia (or the special menorah for those not in the know, the regular menorah hangs out at synagouge and has seven branches instead of nine.) We eat fried foods and a dairy meal. The fried foods are a tie to the celebration of having enough oil to rededicate the desecrated Temple after the battle was over. (We lost that war by the way).The dairy meal is the echo of an older holiday that belongs to Judith, who prevented a war by means of assassination and saved many lives on both sides. (We won that war, so obviously we shouldn't celebrate it). The dreidel celebrated the secret code that was used during a later period of religious suppression when Jews were allowed to gamble but they weren't allowed to study. If you take books away from Jews, they will just start writing on any three dimensional object where they think they can get away with it. . . . 

However - here in the Meat World version of the Dreamtime, First Candle is the official start of the Channuka Taunting.

It works like this - all presents are put out at the beginning of the eight night holiday, they are numbered and you have to open them in order. You get to study the unopened ones during the holiday.  There is always a pattern or a theme to the presents and you have to figure it out. If you don't figure it out by the end of the holiday, I will tell you. There are good things involved in this. The kids know where the gifts come from, they know that the gifts have been thought of, sometimes for months in advance, and they have no idea what I will do each year. The theme is always about things they haven't asked for. One of my favorite years - absolutely everything was in the exact same size Hot Topic box regardless of what the present was. It wasn't the theme, it was the distraction to make the theme difficult. 

They police themselves - there is a code of honor not to shake - although sometimes they stare and try to determine based on shape. They know that the practical will be woven into the wanted. We only give "toys" on birthdays and Channuka, the children, knowing this think of "May I have" in terms of "Can I put this on my list" and have for years.

But this year there is knowledge -- rituals have developed over the six months we have known the Poppets. We have methods for announcing the package, traditions involving the opening, the mandatory 1st hour photos where the new poppets interact with the things in our environment and the slower ritual of "settling" where the poppets try out different places in the house to decide where they would like their home base to be.  There is a lot of bonding in our family over this. We are all creatives in different ways and Poppets are where we meet. 

So therefore I had to tell the children that they were not to preemptively check any packages from Strange Studios for me. It was going to be a very Poppety Channuka. The anticipation has been building for three months. Wondering where the poppets are in the first picture? They are on the mantle - Pretending to be Take-Out containers - there is a reference in that if you can figure it out. I will let you know at the end of the holiday if you haven't gotten it. 

So in the spirit of the Dreamtime I will share the Taunting. First Candle Poppets were given to the people who needed them. You have the same  information the children ( who are not so childish anymore) have.

Orange and Purple have joined our crew. If you look at the bottom of the fireplace you can see our growing Embassy Project. 

Some people put out Holiday Villages, we put out pocket realities. 

We celebrate with many different friends and families so there will be other celebrations as well but the Channuka Taunting belongs to us with flame and food and wit and love. 

Merry Solstice.