When the time comes

to memorialize me in a made-for-TV movie--preferably with a title like Yeah, She Said It, or From Elijah to Backstreet, or What is She Complaining about Now?--please don't let my Randy Quaid-equivalent play me. Make the effort to sign my Dennis Quaid-equivalent instead:

Jumpstart Your Acting Career By Profiting Off The Death Of Tim Russert!, Defamer.

But who could play me? Looking through the latest Bright Young Hollywood feature from Vanity Fair, the talent pickings are slim-to-none. The closest person is Zöe Kravitz, whom the magazine made look as pale as possible. The only other option is to put a wig on Rob Brown (who?). Note in the picture that Mr. Brown, the only black guy in the entire article, is off to the left and in the back. Nice.

The entire photo spread seems to embody the qualities that the American media holds dear: racism, sexism, heternormativity. Heaven forbid a woman be allowed to drive a boat or pilot her own bike or hang out on the sand not draped over a fully-clothed beached whale. That last picture just says it all for me. Ugh.

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