Sweet Hearts....

Salam Ramadhan to everybodddyyyyy!

well this year's ramadhan i intend to make it more meaningful and better than the last. insyaAllah, i can only pray that He allows it and ease it for me.

Since i 've caught the baking bug lately, it has been official that, after being motivated by hubs, i have started to sell some of my bakes. very cute selection they are! hehehe. so in conjunction of the fasting month and approaching Eid, i decided to concentrate on steamed fruitcakes. wait, Hubs decided i focus on steamed fruitcakes. Hmmm now he suddenly sounds like my Managing Director. Already! hahahaha.

So after late nights brainstorming on the idea and on some possible names, we decided to settle on....

BambyBakes!!!

Yeaaaah! why not just keep the bamby eh? after all it is me! hehe. so i've started an instagram account for it. and been doing some promos as well. first time ok! buat benda2 like this! coz i swear, that i'm no good at selling stuff! but pakar membeli adalah! hahahaha. so it felt awkward at times, but i had to learn the art. and when it comes to learning new things, i am up for it!! 

Again, with the help of Managing Director, Mr B, (ehem!), he suggested i do free testers giveaways. i had to listen to a mini "business management" lecture in the process. well its fair lar coz he is the one with that degree! so now u know when it comes to health stuff, who gives the lecture and makes sure it's done around here! *cough*thatshowhequitsmoking*coughcough!*

So i did them. those free giveaways. and at first i was pretty skeptical. and nervous, that nobody would respond! i mean like, hello guys! its free?? i bear all the cost for you to just eat my cake?!! hahaha. turns out my pessimism was downright wrong! tak sampai one hour, i already got 5 people saying "NAK" to my testers!! alhamdulillah! i was overjoyed! yes! even here! so this is where it started! to know if my cake can travel outside kl or not, coz one was to my nurse all the way in Kota bharu hospital! i also learned which courier is available and suitable and what not! wuishhh! mcm ni lar perasaan vivy yusoff dulu masa start business kot!!! waakakakakakaakaka! dream on righhhht! of coz there were technical problems as well, but i'll save that for my "success story interviews" later. wakakakaka!

if at all what made me wanted to blog is, a reaaallly important lesson i learn in all this. People's hearts. u bet! weird i know coz its not related to baking per se. but seriously, I'm humbled by all the experiences. i'm proven wrong at nearly every turn when i think a certain way. slowly but surely, the majority of the ones that actually showed their support TO ME personally, not publicly coz its not important to, are the ones who are near anonymous in my life. or that they are not close, for reasons that are pretty obvious for some i.e. dah lama tak jumpa is one too. they are also those who don't regularly keep in touch with me but are there in the social media world, apparently following my everyday updates. who knew.

i receive private messages from them on how to get their hands on my bakes, and have nothing but honest, positive support on what i do. and i get orders from those who i least expect to be ordering from me too. Subhanallah. Allahu akbar. who knew.

But He knew. And He is showing me that He can give blessings to anyone from anywhere, and only good would come out of it. one thing good i know for sure, is that i'm truly humbled by all this. He showed me the true hearts of people; families and friends, close friends and distant ones, and not to mention, COMPLETE STRANGERS.

that's right. my first 2 orders were from COMPLETE STRANGERS. Subhanallah. they had nothing but kind words and encouragements for me. and i don't even know them. ya Allah. i am in tears now. literally. please continue to guide me. and all others out there. to be humble and loving to one another. i know now how it feels to be at the receiving end. even tho i've been at this end countless times before. but i guess i only get to see it in a totally different light, like only now! and i'm glad i did! esp before my time is up! *cries!* how amazing are these people, people who hardly know me and are not even close, they were the ones who were swift in support, as if they really appreciate what i do. and show it! i mean i definitely feel appreciated! it's as if they know how hard it was for me to do them,  finding time secretly, even tho i don't show it on instagram! heck, instagram makes it all looks so simple and breezy and brings out the "oh-she-got-time-lar-thats-why-she-can!" reactions instead! pfft! pretty obvious lar who will be where and what in that success story interviews of mine! hehe! oops! 

Sarcasm aside, (sheesh, i've really got to stop this!), how lucky of them to be given that quality by You Ya Allah. that kind of heart. a quality that i can now pray to have. i need a  better heart. so that my children sees it from me growing up. and they will carry it out naturally. and be a lot more awesome-r than their mother. in His eyes. insyaAllah.

Since this is the month of blessings and forgiveness, may He forgives me for my sins. and yours too. and pls make doa for me in this new venture of mine. i only hope to make people happy through my bakes, for people to enjoy them, for i feel happy when you are happy. I'm eternally grateful coz He has reaaallly blessed me. and what i do. and i can only try to be a good servant to Him in return. That little i know, but already that challenging. I also believe He has written provisions and rizq for each and every one of us. so i am not afraid. for what He gives me, only He can give. and no one can take it away. and what He gives you, only He can give. and no one, not even i, can take that away. I pray to not be afraid of losing wealth, or be greedy for it. for none of it is really mine. not even the clothes i have. in the end, we will all go back to Him. and whatever is with Him, is long-lasting. and waaaaayy better. =)

So ok. Don't forget to order these fruitcakes okay! teehee! #sempatlagi #adahashtagkatblog #terbaik!

1.5kg of yumminess insyaAllah! Yours for only RM75!

Red velvet with cream cheese and choc ganache topping!

Follow my instagram @bambybakes for more infos, reviews and for orders!

Till then. Salam you lovely people! May Allah bless us ALL, irregardless of race and religion, to have sweet hearts! 

My wealth...

wow wow wow!

Assalamualaikum everybodyyyy! *blows dust*

i keep telling myself nobody really reads my blog so much. so mcm tak kisah sgt nak update. but after a recent comment from this hamba Allah, it motivated me to try and find the time to at least write out something than leaving it to collect more dust, so to speak. Thank you by the way, i hope you know who you are. May He bless you greatly for being so sweet.

So it's 2015 already. and Alhamdulillah to start the year, i've been blessed with a milestone that i think surpasses other achievements i've experienced thus far. or maybe at the same level as some.

Alhamdulillah, Yusuf has already hafal all of Juz Amma! And if nak sgt letak date, well i decided to test him on my birthday last month! hehe. This is happening concurrently with some of the other hafazan of surahs in the quran. so for now he dah tahu:

• Al-Mulk
• Al-Waqiah
• An-Najm
• Al Mudatthir
• Ar-Rahman

And now tengah rehearsing surah Luqman, Al-qiyamah and Al-Haqqah. please note that sometimes he would get confuse with certain verses if they happen to sound the same. but i pon honestly tak tahu nak cakap he "hafal" or "baca" these surahs. As for the juz amma, he can do both. so what i do is to hold the quran in front of me (yes yes mak dia tak hafal lar surah2 ni lagi kaaan), and wud ask him to recite the surah in front of me without looking at his quran. so InsyaAllah safe to say, the above surahs he memang dah hafal and baca.

Alhamdulillah. Indeed there is no power or strength except that is with Allah.

And like every other "uncommon" parents, my hubs and I both decide not to celebrate birthdays as big in our family. In fact we don't celebrate at all. instead, we would like to celebrate on achievements based on what we deem worthy with our plans. And Allah is the Master Planner. So achievements, of course, is not limited to be celebrated once a year. If yusuf or maryam meets the required number of achievements or goals set  by us in that year, say more than twice, then so be it. insyaAllah, ada rezeki memang buat lar celebration yg we all mampu for them. we choose to be uncommon. not boring. heh.

I also learnt something valuable about kids. firstly, i had to be really patient lar when it comes to relenting to Yusuf's request for a machine gun, yang upgraded (read mahal) version (not the RM5 daiso ones which he already have 3). u know, as an accomplishment prezie. dia tak mintak pon. nor did i make it a deal that if he completed them, he will get a present. tapi, after tak sampai seminggu main, rosakkkk!!!! fooooohhh! fooooohhh! Daiso yg murah tu jugak yang tahan lama! and he wasn't even upset! i was! he just happily went like "oooohhh dah rosak!" and went to pick up the old rifle and start shooting! 

So mots for me, anak2 ni memang not born with materialistic attitudes. it's the mak bapak yang ajar. He didn't care that the expensive ones needed to be handled with care more than the cheap ones. yang he tahu is to just play. patut mahal lagi lar tahan lasak kan? sheeesh. i feel like i've been conned! but that's the beauty in the innocence and purity of a child. they tak kisah pon you kasi presents mahal or murah. they're just happy enough to even get! why we as parents fall prey to buying expensive ones instead of so called cheap stuff as gifts? or rasa if beli yang murah equates to tak sayang banyak compare beli yang mahal2? sebab orang2 lain yg sibuk ni akan comment "laaa ini jer you bagi anak you for your birthday?? you're like what... a doctor koooot!! kedekut gilerrrr!"

Padahal, mak yang you judge kedekut tu ada principles on raising her child. ye memang she ada banyak duit. tapi dia choose to "kaya"-kan anak2 dia dengan akhlak you tak kisah plak kan? in fact ada orang tahu Yusuf can read surah2 ni pon ada jer parents don't even bat an eyelid coz, well, not impressed lar. well to each their own. level of wealth. even the term wealth gives 1001 meanings to everyone of us. despite it being different, do know that it is YOU who to put the worth and value to your own term of wealth.

As for me, i try to seek Allah's standards as much as i can. After all, all this, that He has blessed me with: the knowledge, the ilham, and the success to follow through with plans, everything! is from Him and Him alone. So yeah. obviously He has my full attention for me to please than anyone else.

So ok. till then! terpanjang plak! hahaha. if tak terbebel tu bukan docbamby namanya!

Do make doa for my family if we ever cross your mind and land a spot on your soft, loving heart for it. 

Goodnight!

My "wealth" indeed. Thank You Allah!

yeaaaaaa! this one tooooo!!! the brains behind our family's plans! :P

We are 5!

Salam everybodyyyy!!!

*krik krik krik* *crickets chirping in background*

okay okay. i've been AWOL for quite sometime. i honestly dunno what reasons to give. but that's just it. it's all excuses! haha. and of course been verrrrry busy. *ehem*

I just celebrated my 5th anniversary recently. who knew eh? open close open close eyes dah 5 tahun! and it's as tho it is literally that long! only a blink of an eye!

Anyways, like most couples, we are truly blessed we have gotten this far and at where we are today. I'm truly grateful for the blessings He has bestowed in our little family! Marriage is indeed an investment worth paying attention to for the rewards of a successful akhira. and as He had intended, being parents constitute a big part of our marriage. i'm extremely grateful of how He has guided us in it. For i definitely see His miracles in this everyday!

So i thank You countlessly Ya Allah, for our partnership here in this world. You indeed know what is best for me. and may it be Your mercy and love that we end up together in Your Jannah, amongst the chosen ones who would do just about ANYTHING for You and You alone. InsyaAllah.

La hawla wala quwwata illah billah.

There is no power or might except with Allah.

True indeed.

Ada big mirror, apa lagi kegunaannya kaaan?

and look who decides to join us. He mmg pantang nampak mommy
and daddy manja2 dua orang!

Now he's just being cheeky.

Our girlie selfie Maryam honey!

and we won't stop.... supporting our Palestinian brothers and sisters!

Now it wouldn't be an anniversary post without a pantun right?

Sayang, sayang aduhai sayang,

Sayang yang legal sudah 5 tahun,

Perutmu sudahku boroikan abang,

Supaya yang lain tak nak pandang pun!
So you're stuck with me, and me alone!

Gendang gendut tali kecapi,

Cik abangku gendut, saya tetap happy!
hehehe!

Eh! asyik pantun pasal perut jerrr! hahaha. ok. saving the best one for last! Impromptu poem ready? set? gooo!

5 years of marriage, 

5 years have passed,

5 years we paid homage

To the One who made it last.

It's been 5 years of knowledge,

Of us and of Him,

It's also 5 years of privilege,

To get us closer to Him.

In 5 years we became 4,

And as fours, we love only one.

It's from that One, that we are 4,

Coz without Him, we are none.

Thank You Allah for our 5,

May we continuously live in sunnah,

to love each other we strive,

and be the best of our Rasul's ummah.

For it is our very own pursuit of Jannah.

I love you, ya habibi.

Ad-Duha

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Compassionate.

1. I swear by the forenoon,
2. And by the night when it becomes peaceful,
3. Your Lord has neither forsaken you, nor has become displeased.
4. Surely the Hereafter is much better for you than the present life.
5. And of course, your Lord will give you so much that you will be pleased.
6. Did He not find you an orphan, and give you shelter?
7. Did He not find you lost and guide you?
8. Did He not find you in need and made you self-sufficient?
9. So do not be harsh with the orphan
10. And do not chide the one who asks for help
11. Talk about the blessings of your Lord.

Sadaqallahu'l azim.

Definitely one of the many favourite surahs of mine. May it benefit us all insyaAllah.

I had another natural birth!

Salam and good day everybody!

Well well well!! It's that time again! I gave birth! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! 

So let's get crackin with the birth story shall we?

As an avid hypnobirthing student, we ( yeap hubs and i) were determined to have another natural birth of our baby. But the drawback this time was my previous gynae wouldn't allow me to have a birth plan as extensive as before because of the incident where a medical counsellor succumbed to homebirth from complications.

"But even if i deliver kat hospital? I bukan nak buat kat rumah boss!"

"Sorry fatin. But i can only let you go as far the last time. Come in for appointment and i will explain."

Heartbroken and to cut the story short, i tak jadi pergi lar appointment dia kan. We had to resort to searching for a gynae that would support this birth plan of ours for a natural birth. And we stumbled and decided on Dr Idora from Pantai Bangsar. And i must say during follow ups, the vibes and cooperation we got from her has been awesome. She scanned through our birth plan and just said "Ok! No problem!" Alhamdulillah! Nnt iA i put a post khas for her jer lar ok! Hehehe.

So fast forward to 29th April. I was awakened by a sudden urge to go poo-poo. But when i did go, nothing happened. So ok. The peculiar thing about it was i couldn't find myself standing too long coz i felt "heavy" down there. It was unusual coz it kinda came on and off and i had to sit down to let it pass. I thought it could be braxton hicks coz it was pretty mild. Hubs noticed this but head to work anyways knowing it could be a false alarm. Yusuf was still sleeping, so i decided to make some breakfast first. Even then i started feeling it during memasak tu. But somehow i carried on and yusuf woke up just in time to eat them.

So after eating, i decided to do the usual which is to shower and bathe yusuf as well. Since the sensation is still there, I decided to time it. And guess what, the pattern fits the 511 code!! (One surge lasting 5 mins for 1 hour). But the difference was that it felt more like mengeras, not like the pretty obvious surges i felt masa Yusuf dulu and there was no show too. I whatsapped hubs telling him about it and siap emailed my contraction tracker. And he was like "wow! I should head home right?" At that point i didn't really know what to answer coz i worry it would be a false alarm coz tak berapa sakit and kesian if cuti dia wasted. BOLEH TAKK??!!

Anyways he got home another hour later and i got yusuf ready. This time is about nearly 11am and i sempat did solat Dhuha to ask for His blessings. I waited at home sitting on one of the birth balls i have (i got 2 of diff sizes btw!) as it provides me comfort coz I'm pretty used to using them. In the car, nearing the hosp, the sensation got slightly intense so i thot haaa ok jugaklar pergi hospital ni. We arrived in the labour room about 12pm, but sampai jer for initial assessment, the thing mcm slowly dissappeared and the nurse mcm tak convince i was in labour so they didn't alert the doctor in case CTG showed no active signs and i could be discharged back home. I pun was calmly talking to the nurse and they macam tak rasa i was having labour pain. Plus, initially i refused VE (vaginal examination), but after realizing i could be sent back i might as well know if my os is open or not lar kan. I just dont like them VEs!!!

False alarms!

Salam everybody!

Last week thursday morning, i was surprised with strong Braxton Hicks! i actually thought, "oh wow! is the baby coming already?" I guess you can tell i was pretty nervous this time! Coz if ikut EDD (not that i ikut lar kan), it will be about 20 days earlier. Plus, my gynae was away on a holiday that week! Had to somehow pujuk baby if she really think it's time and best to come out without our gynae around. But then i realized, we needed God more than our gynae lar kan. She had told me she will have a replacement colleague to cover for her should i be in labour then. Whatever it is, it is His help and blessings that we want on the big day. If He says it's better without my gynae around but with a replacement, mesti lar ok jugak kan? End up mesti yakin with His decision after the countless doas and berserah to Him for the best outcome. So i started to calm down and re-explained to baby that it is ok either way. And that we (mommy, daddy and abang Yusuf) will be ready for her regardless. It made me feel a lot better and i actually got excited!

But somehow, the false surges subsided by evening. phew! hehe. so it wasn't that day after all! bukan apa. Masa tu lar start thinking about my baby bag and that it was not completely ready. But now it is, thanks to baby! hehe you got daddy to do most of the packing plak tu! Clever girllll help mommy! heheheeh!

Anyways, went for my check up last Wednesday and was told baby is doing great in there! And i also informed my gynae regarding the thursday incident and she told me she actually cancelled her trip to Istanbul! simply because she had quite a number of mommies delivering that week and it didn't feel right for her to leave them to another doctor. Talk about dedication! Awesome ok! and still a blessing for us coz maybe she would have been too busy to attend to us ker kan? hehehe. Alhamdulillah. Whatever happened, it has happened for the best. This has got to be the millionth time to remind me that I am in no control whatsoever of my situations and that Allah ALWAYS KNOWS BEST! haih nak kena smack on the face banyak2 kali whenever i start stressing out or worry excessively about the future! degil betul!

So doc said her head is already engaged so it's gonna be anytime soon. But she still gave me 2 weeks appointment should  baby decides to be cozy in there for a little while more. Mommy ok jer k! heheehe.

Till then peeps! Don't forget me in your doas if i happen to be in your thoughts! i pun nak kena maximize my "preggy-mom-doas" sementara belom beranak lagi ni! Kan doa ibu mengandung mustajab? hehe. insyaAllah i will include most of you that i know! It's been advised to not be kedekut to make doa for other people, coz it will have a ping-pong/boomerang effect back at you! And yang paling best is that His mercy for you yang rajin doakan orang lain, will increase! siapa tak nak kannn?! I nak!!! ;) 

To mommy's saviours...

Dearest Yusuf and baby,

Im sorry my posts have been of sorrow and frustration lately. And this is another one i'm afraid. But do know it doesn't happen on a daily basis alhamdulillah. God is that kind to me. It's just that i need a place to vent and by talking imaginatively to you both gives me solace and comfort. I'll try and make it not so disheartening ok?

U see, i just feel lost of support and love lately. Don't get me wrong. None of it came from either of you. In fact both of you are the only ones that i'm damn confident loves me for who i am. And Allah of course. But being a person of not so high iman, i sometimes doubt He loves me. But i'm trying my best to push that thought out of me ok? Why? Coz it's wrong and forbidden ok my babies! Both of u don't sesekali doubt His love. The signs of His love are too many for the human mind to count or comprehend! So please don't take over this flaw from mommy ok? And because i don't want that in both of you, i will try my bestest to show you how being grateful to Him is done iA. Both of you are my ever-growing motivators!

You see, Allah is right in telling us not to expect much out of humanly love. Coz they are bound to dissappoint you and will not be able to sustain or be in constant increment for you. Only His love is all that. So i'm now learning to only seek for His love and be dependent to it only. Coz He promised that He will never let me down. And He will always answer and return my love as long as i want His. And His love is eternal. And He never breaks His promises.

Plus, the love for another human being comes and goes. Waxes and wanes. And it could just decrease and diminish altogether. Simple reasons could be because of boredom or frustration of one another. We humans take pride of being the most intelligent because of our ability to think and having the most complex brain function compared to all other life forms on earth. But sadly, our emotional sympathy and empathy towards each other might not be superior than that of a tiger or a monkey. They seem to portray genuinity in love and compassion without prejudice way better than most of us. Thus i'm keeping animal planet on our astro subscription for us to watch and learn ok? :)

And do know that just because ur related by blood to another person, does not guarantee one bit that you will get the love and respect that you have been tricked into believing. I've had my fair shares of just having the company for laughter and happiness only, but left to float in my boat alone when i'm sad or hurt. It's the "i tak nak masuk campur" or "not my problem" attitude that made me a victim countless times. And just because i'm the eldest, i'm so-called the one that has to be the most understanding and can supposedly handle my issues on my own. If only i have turned them down before when they needed me for comfort. Will they then realize how disrespectful they have been towards me? But that is why their lives are the way it is, and how mine turned up beautifully like this. God is Most Fair. Guess it's whether or not they are "smart" enough to realize it. 

So mommy prays, really hard, that both of you will have a great, strong and loving relationship as siblings. You may notice how it is done, but just because it will look one-sided from me, do know i'm not being nice for them. I'm doing it because of Him. i'm seeking for His love. And He loves it when you do good things to please Him regardless if you're treated badly in return. And i do it because i want to enter His jannah IA. So i'm gonna try my bestest to raise you both well with full of individual, not-shared, love. Don't ever doubt that mommy can have lots of love given to me to shower you both with them EACH. A mommy's heart will never have limits of love for their kids. The more children she has, the more love is injected in her to be given for that new child. Percayalah!

And one more thing u need to believe, is that mommies are given super strength and powers to be able to do all that single-handedly! That's right! To have a partner with her is a bonus. But do know that the same bonus is not for everybody. That bonus can be in many other forms too. So whichever type of bonus you both will get, remember that they are not meant to last. And it can be as little as a one-off thingy to some, and a few times to others. All that is from His knowledge. Yang penting, is to get the ultimate reward that is confirmed long lasting iA. That, my babies, will be in the akhirat. So i'm ok with just on and off bonuses here. And with or without it, my love for you will not be affected or falter one bit iA!

To think my problems are of a great deal, it is nothing compared to the victims of the missing airplane MH370, which was confirmed to have been missing for good tonite. The whole dissappearance and search and rescue took 17 days till this announcement came from our prime minister. 17 days sayang! I'm sure not a day goes by without full of worry from the victim's family members. I wouldn't want to imagine the horror being traded places in their shoes. May their souls rest in peace and be amongst the righteous insyaAllah. 

I guess that is all for tonite sayangs. Alhamdulillah, i actually do feel better. Don't worry about mommy too much when you both are able to read this. It's definitely not the lowest point of my life as i dramatically made it to be. I guess i'm just sad, and frustrated for the need of my own voice to be heard. But i know it is being heard. It's just that i've been concentrating and expecting help from the wrong source. Silly me. I know better now. And hope to be istiqamah with this guidance given to me iA.

Adik, hang in there ok? Mommy tak stress mana. I doa that all this realization will pass down to you so that you will have an epic emotional quotience and empathy for people. And none whatsoever of my emotional outbursts. In fact, with you being in me, has helped me able to think rationally and act unselfishly. Simply because i want you, and abang, to be a much better person than i am. And most importantly, full of love for our Maker. InsyaAllah.

Goodnight darlings. I know you both know that I love you. Very much.

Misfortune March :(

Dearest Yusuf and adik,

i realized if i were to make a post directly to both of you it will be less dramatic and emotional. but instead be full of love and care to explain of the recent misfortune that happened to our country. And a bit to myself. Who else better to talk to than you guys eh? *kiss*

Everyone in Malaysia, and partly the whole world, is aware of the missing MAS plane MH370, 5 days ago. Yes, its been 5 days babies. The plane just miraculously disappeared off radar while en route to Beijing, and it has been quiet ever since. Our country's search and rescue team and some volunteers from other countries are all out there looking for this plane. Mommy can only pray and hope for the best that Allah will bestow His mercy onto this misfortune that He has allowed to happen. My heart and doa goes to the family of the passengers and crew involved.

Altho i was going to write about my frustration of some people's reactions to the whole thing, all i know is that it will be futile. Coz basically they are nasty sayang. And sadly the world has quite a lot of them nasty peeps. And mommy's assumption on why they are so, is because their mommies didn't love them enough. Esp during growing up. Im pretty convinced. Only people without good mothering will have that amount of bad-mouthing and atrocious attitude. It really does show.

Speaking of which, i've been having my fair share of tests lately on parenting as well. With the haze happening, mommy fell sick. And so are you Yusuf. So it's been 3 consecutive nights where you couldn't sleep peacefully from your cough and being all restless. Honestly at times i felt like losing it but i had to hold it in and just cried helplessly instead. Coz i know u must be soo uncomfortable and it's definitely not your fault. And i just happen to be sooooo tired sayang. So much so i nearly passed out one day in the toilet. Had to be from the lack of sleep and extreme fatigue. Not to mention the viral infection going on. But alhamdulillah so far still ok and adik, masyaAllah, you are strong baby! Allah is definitely the best to watch over u! And i'm so grateful for that! Coz i know you can feel all the internalized negative emotions i'm feeling. May it not affect you permanently sayang. Do excuse mommy.

I can really now say that being a mom, beats being a wife anytime. Everyone will need a mother. Not all will need a wife. I should know coz u both, esp abang Yusuf now is showing how much he really needs me. Nobody can replace me. not even daddy. So i should also come to terms that as a married adult, we also need our mommies sometimes. So am gonna trade this negative feeling of how things are thrown to me lately simply because someone needs his mother. Gonna try my best not to care so much iA.

I can only wish that all moms out there, whether working or staying at home, to please strive to give good mothering and parenting to your kids. The amount of time u have with them may differ but what's important is we try to shower them with love and care, the best way we can by Allah's standards. Coz I've seen the product of children raised by a sore mom. As much as these kids try to outgrow or remove the malice being directly/indirectly shown to raise them, sadly they will never obliterate the bad habit completely. It will always be a part of them. As if imprinted in their genes.

Trust me when i say that is true. They can try to change or read up every parenting book and tips when they become parents themselves. but at the time when they are vulnerable, that's when you see his/her mother and father's characters break through. So if bad examples were being taught, that's exactly what will come out. It's freakin scary, and worst is when you think they will be different from their parents. But they can't. I guess it's trying to tell us that raising children is not a piece of cake. So i can only vow and strive to not be that selfish to you both. By letting my flaws pour out whenever i feel like it. 

Coz Yusuf, i pray for you to be a great man and husband and father to your family. And adik, i pray for you to be a great wife and mother to your family too. It's been said that only our prophet and his sahabat were great husbands to their wives. But in order to get that kind of man, the wife must be of khadijah's or aisha's trait as well. It is only fair i guess. Even tho i'm nowhere near, as a mother i can only pray for His kindness to bestow that blessing for the both of you.

So i'm happy to be a mother. Coz i know as a person, i have the most say to how things go in terms of raising you. No other human beings like your aunties, uncles, grandparents or even daddy can overtake me in terms of being responsible for you. Not as long as He says i'm still around. So i will face anyone who tries to challenge my god-given authority head on. And may they be stricken with shame whenever they try to coz they know they have never, or will ever, come close to how i'm doing my job.

In view of all things that are happening now, i don't know if it will get worst or better. But whatever it is, i'm somewhat content about it coz i know this life is not permanent in the first place. So i'm not gonna worry myself sick if im not 100% happy here. Coz we're not meant to. The final resting place is set. And there, we're promised everlasting happiness and immeasureable pleasure way beyond anything that can be given in this life. And not to mention stress-free! May we be amongst those destined and worthy for jannah my babies. InsyaAllah. 

Forever grateful to have you both, 

Mommy. 

January dah habissss???

Salam everybody!

Ok. i don't know about you but time flies so freakin fast no??? indeed time is a "makhluk" ciptaan Allah! It can be 'fast' or 'slow' to every individual. and to think we won't be limited by TIME in the akhirat nanti!

So i guess i just have to do what i do best, and that is to summarize the events that has happened throughout this month. I must say it's been pretty colorful regardless how one choose to look at it.

Baby update

Since my last post, i guess i didn't disclose to uolls whether the current baby in tummy is a boy or a girl. That's because i didn't get it scanned by that time. and by the time we did, we (hubs and I) are thrilled! It's gonna be a baby GIRL insyaAllah!

So that explains my super domestic skills of late! hahaha. Semoga diturunkan kerajinan itu to you baby girl! Daddy is really excited! Coz now he gets the chance to be on his toes more in raising you. and it is what he wants! but don't worry. Mommy will be just as close as well. Pampering and dressing you up won't be much of his forte. hehe! We are in love with you already babygirl!!!!

#SwedenLetThemGo

As some of you are aware, there is this news about a Malaysian family in Sweden where the parents are locked up in jail because the mother was found guilty of hitting one of their children and the authorities knew about it. But why the dad was jailed as well was kinda a mystery (jeng jeng jeng!). To cut the long story short, hubs's boss, as head of Biro Aduan Rakyat for Pemuda UMNO had to follow up on the case and hope to help them as best as he can. So after doing some research locally, he decided to visit the kids who are held in a swedish foster care in Stockholm.

And wherever he goes, that's where 90% chance (or maybe more) of where my hubs would go too. it was quite a last minute decision coz i was only informed the probability of him going to Sweden that very morning of their so called departure date. and he actually said he didn't wanna go in view of leaving me here alone with yusuf and baby. But i was like "WHHAAAAATTTTTTT??!!!" u gotta be kidding right? it's sweden! plus he's been busy with the case here and would leave the opportunity of settling it there finally??!! and when in the world can he get the chance to go to SWEDEN in the near future??? i mean considering how things are at the moment, the chance is kinda slim kannn?

So of course in the end, he went and i was happily packing his stuff for him until it's time for him to leave. OK masa ni i dah "damn, me and big mouth!" coz dah berjurai-jurai airmata and berdrama kat rumah! And it went on pretty bad the next few days. coz he was scheduled to be there for a week. Gosh. Again, TIME. A week felt sooooo long! But Alhamdulillah, they managed to settle the things they were set out to do and is now on his way back to KL. Yeap. As i'm typing this. He's transiting in Amsterdam for about 8 hours. 

So congrats nafiq and team! And thank you #Swedenforlettingthemgo!

Masa nak depart. Perasan tak org tu siap pandang camera and doa tak angkat tangan.
Nnt ada yg label wahabi nanti! hehe!

It was -5 degrees there! and snowing!!!
Gaaaaahhh! bestnyerrrr! i could use this right nowww!

With Ketua Biro Aduan Rakyat Pemuda UMNO
Sheikh Nafiq Alfirdaous!

We are 4!

Salam everyone! Hope it's not too late to wish everyone a blessed aidiladha.

As you know, this celebration has many meanings especially in commemeration of our prophet Ibrahim AS and his son's Ismail AS's sacrifice for Allah. It's a test of a father's love for a longing son, to see if his love for him exceeded the love for Allah. Coz in reality, this can easily happen to alot of parents. And the warning sent by Allah about it is every bit true. "Harta dan anak-anak are tests for you." So ada orang, banyak duit is their downfall, whereas others are their children. How many stories have we heard that parents will do anything for the kids including closing an eye on the immoral bad things they do? Banyak kan.

It is definitely a big reminder for me. I just have to keep it alive every now and then to prevent myself from getting carried away after having a child that my actions overlook my other real responsibilities as Allah's slave. InsyaAllah may i be steadfast on the righteous path. To make it our "sacrifice" this time, Yusuf was down with fever after his visit to his grandparents. Honestly, my challenge here is to withold every possible thing i could throw at them as blame. But it happened. And by the end of the day, it is still hubby and i that have to bersengkang mata and worry with agony of his health. Sigh. So am doing the whole redha thing. And refraining from pointing the obvious whenever someone tries to piss me off. Honestly, do not mess with a sleep-deprived, fatigued and a hormonal mom. Trust me, you'll never win.

Ok, sadness aside. Today also marks the 4th year of my marriage to hubs. Alhamdulillah! 4 tahun dah. And we managed to still be together, happy and loving. Despite the turmoils and downs that crops up every now and then, but am glad it did not make us fail to see the overall picture of how we really love each other. And we only have Allah to thank for that. 

As usual, it is mostly the wives that does this whole "my hubs is the greatest" post on facebook, twitter, instagram and not forgetting blogs. I mean since this post is about my anniversary as well, all the more reason to talk about him kan? Hehe. Well maybe not too much. As we all know rahsia rumahtangga should be just kept within, well duhh, the rumahtangga lar (home). The good and bad ones. And honestly, as much as i've learned this a long time, my propensity to share things about us, has been damaging. Sure it doesn't happen as often as how i first started, but still, being fault-free of this offense is not impossible. Cuma lemah ikut nafsu or not jer.

Although, i must have done something right growing up for Allah to answer my prayers when i was a naive young girl. I prayed for a soleh husband to guide me in the right path and that i will be his loving companion to make him happy. Either that, or the obvious fact that God loves me more than i do Him. And that He's ever so generous to give and give when in actual fact i may not have deserved it in the first place. But since He is the most generous and loving, one can't simply compare that to our humanly qualities or even question His power to simply do so. In fact, it's now a new test to see if I will appreciate the generosity given to me and take good care of it. instead of being cocky like I deserve it without effort or question. Spoilt brat big time namanya!

Fun-filled February!

Salam and good evening everyone!

It seems this whole blogging thing is not going so smoothly for me. i can hardly update anything in a month? atrocious! eheh! But boy, do i have an update for what's been going on in february for uolls!

So why not i highlight in summary of the things that happened. (it looks like it's becoming a habit this summarizing things ni!)

1. February marks the special month simply because it was one year ago i delivered our lil bubba Yusuf on the 19th! Alhamdulillah! He's doing well on the developmental milestones and growth charts, and STILL on only mommy's good ol breastmilk! May he has the rezeki to have breastmilk and grow healthily till 2 years old insyaAllah!

2. Another awesome thing that happened this month was our first family trip overseas! and it was to Bangkok! This was in conjunction with Mr B's company trip and i gotta tell ya, it was heaps of fun! We were with old and new friends and Bangkok, much to my surprise, is not that dangerous after all! (read Bangkok Dangerous) hehe. And it definitely appealed to me in a pleasant kinda way! Thank God we weren't exposed to any of the stuff seen in The Hangover 2 ok! I mean, prolly because it was a family trip so no trips to the dodgy areas anyway! hehe.

So enough of me rambling, coz i don't want to be making this post long and draggy. and also the fact that I'm kinda pressured to do this entry as well lar! haha! but in a good way of course!

So with that, i leave you with some pics for you to enjoy. Might as well right? ;P But please take note that i didn't do a lot of pic taking so there are some credits to our organizer of the trip, Badrul Mansor. Thanks Bad!

Bubba's first passport photo!!! Gaaaahhh!!!

   

the cute little people in our tour!

January in a post!

Salam and helloooo everybody!

Sorry for the silence since entering 2013! January pun dah habis today! Reason? well, none really in particular i guess. Ilham tak datang nak blog boleh? hehe. So here's a rough list of what happened since new year:

1. Yusuf had fever since last year! Okaaayy! A bit too dramatic lar (some things never change! ;P). He was sick for nearly a week with JUST fever. Thankfully he recovered without me panicking the worst! Im guessing teething kot, coz i can see a new tooth emerging lateral to his middle upper incisors!

2. Then Mr B got sick. Unfortunate to start the year with this new ailment. But nevertheless am grateful that it's not that serious and thankful for the much-awaited wake-up call for him! InsyaAllah, with this test, I am convinced he will be rewarded greatly too. Amin. :)

3. Got involved in giving a talk to old folks in JB on "kesihatan warga emas". Altho the talk was suppose to only last 1 hour, but the preparation i tell u, takes me about a month! So since i didnt get to finish my work, i vowed to not update my blog becoz it will look like i have the time for blogging but no discipline on my powerpoint! Hahaha! Alasan kan?

4. January of coz it's a dear month to me simply because i was born innit. So yeah peeps! I turned 30 on the 19th aritu! Butttttt.... I learned that it's just another day and i am grateful to be given the oppurtunity to be 30 and become what i am now. Alhamdulillah. So for me, life begins at 30. It doesn't hurt to go all "i get what life is" earlier by 10 years i think! hehe. In fact, i'm gonna rock it! =P. I spent the day out with momma and aloot coz mr B was working. Then we had a small family dinner that night.

5. We had our mini break at Thistle Port Dickson on Sunday. This was after we attended mr B's boss-friend's E-day! (congrats nafiq!). It is definitely a fun family hotel, where the pool, in my opinion is the main attraction. Dalam ok! but the beach sadly wasn't that spectacular. And because it was during the holidays, there were ALOT of people! ok, i sound like i'm anti-crowd or something, but i'm more of a not-so-hectic-hotel-staying kinda person. i don't like it too quiet either, but too many people made the breakfast experience mcm kat hawker stall! but nevertheless it was ok. My fave PD hotel so far would be Avillion. =)

As they say, pictures tell a thousand words. So i might as well do that coz Yusuf is stirring from his nap from the sound of my typing! enjoy!

1. Mommy-baby date at Fit For 2 Bangsar.

Yusuf at FF2. Nak jadi the next chuck hughes ker cyg? hehe

Yusuf wants to play!

With Lucas! Color-coded bros!

With stunning mommy of twins Staphanie! seen here with Jo-ash.

Witht the beautiful mommy Sophie and Lucas!

Swapping mommies and both not liking the idea!

We were preggy together, now all have popped!

2. Date with Iza the pinkstilettos, and Suraya the red flats (not in pic! grrr!). I am officially Fatin the purple wedges! =P

Our Tea at Delicious! mmg delicious!!

Doing Iza's famous pose!

3.  Day out with mommy and aloot!

Sisterly love! smoooocchhh!

Me with my mama!!! looooveee!

While grandma was shopping!

Us!

4. PD mini vacay!

Off to PD we go!!!

Swimming is a MUST!

Playing with daddy in the playroom!

Let's play ball!!!

Daddy! why u bury me in these balls?!!

mommy stay inside the house ok!!

Nak jalaaannn!!!

Breakfast by the beach!!!

Main air kat beach pulak! yeaaaayyy!

Ok mommy yg stress seluar dia dah basah! But he likes it!

Checking out dah!!! Thanks daddy!!!

In the car: don't want holiday to end! =P

So that's about it! Hope u enjoyed the pics! nak upload banyak lagi but then this post won't be published in the January section nanti! hehe.

Till next time!

=)