I Used To Work At The Laundromat But Then It Folded

Some Christian rock, for the holidays.

Wormdoom -

"Blessed Assurance Part One"

If You Don't Like My Standards Then I Have Others

"I've owned albums with cover art way worse than this", I sometimes tell myself in an effort to provide myself some comfort whenever I pull this one out of the milk crate, but it doesn't really help.

Still one of the best compilations ever -- not "Flex Your Head" level, or "Boston Not L.A." level, but maybe only a step or two below. This flows remarkably well, considering for the most part it's a bunch of aggressive/weird NYC bands thrown next to each other. Perhaps due to marketability issues, the label folded not long after this was released.

"The Dustdevils discography is very long and confusing so why don't you just go to Sounds and look in the 'D' bin instead" -- from the liner notes, which presumably someone was fired over.


Dustdevils -

"Throw The Bottle Full"

Cop Shoot Cop -

"Dive"

Circle X -

"Crash (St. Sebastian of The Hood)"

OWT -

"Alive With Pleasure"

Unsane -

"Boost"

Eternal Nothingness Is Fine If You Happen To Be Dressed For It

My 99-cent tour through the Siltbreeze catalog rolls along with this Ashtabula 12", which from the outside looks like it could be an abstract noise record, but on the inside is actually loud, catchy indie rock à la Sebadoh, or Helikopter (Balt-o band that I posted about once), or even Siltbreeze alums Monkey 101 in a handful of ways. Side Two meanders a bit, otherwise I wouldn't dig this as much -- if it were more straightforward it would be disappointing -- although there's still some part of me that wonders why this rec is such an easy pick-up on Discogs, especially considering its prime Bardo Pond / Strapping Fieldhands pedigree. But, it worked out in my favor this time (unlike the Sam Esh + Hard Black Thing record, which I'll probably never listen to again), so far be it for me to complain.


Ashtabula -

"Nineteenpointsix"

"Way Too Fast"

If Love Is Blind Then I Wish You Were Out Of Sight

This is something that I picked up on one of my first record-shopping trips into Boston after moving into the area last year - at a store on Mass. Ave that sold mostly old jazz sides, so I was somewhat psyched when I saw this peeking out at me from one of the bins, and not just because it's a great single but also because it was just a buck. Dynamic Truths were wunna Bob Schick's post-Honor Role bands (Honor Role = legendary), and this 7" was the only thing that they released, at least up until a retrospective CD that came out on Little Black Cloud about a half-decade ago (which I've actually never seen, tho I managed to swipe a couple mp3's from some blog way back when). Musically this sorta sounds like Honor Role re-imagining songs from the first Christian Death LP, and if that sounds lame to you then it's not, it's fuggin' top notch. I just pull these descriptions out of my ass, you realize that by now, right?

Dynamic Truths -

"You Take It All"

"Profit From Loss"

Maybe I Could've Gotten Somewhere If My Aim Were Straighter

Negative Trend minus (-) everyone who went on to form Flipper = Toiling Midgets / PiL-inspired post-punkness. This single is from a later lineup that featured Mark Eitzel of American Music Club on (serious, dramatic) vocals. There was also an album released on Matador around this time which supposedly features some quality obtuse rockness, but I don't have it. Hello, Discogs....


Toiling Midgets -

"Golden Frog"

When Everything Is Coming Your Way It Means You're In The Wrong Lane

I was pretty psyched to find this at Deep Thoughts (record store in Cambridge) the other weekend -- "Early Singles", a collection of Bimbo Shrineheads (aka Shrinnirs) stuff that I'd otherwise hadn't heard, for the most part, or even had any idea that it had existed. The package is pretty funky -- an LP jacket spray-painted black so heavily that it became soggy and warped, a tape reel box affixed to the front with a booklet and some papers inside, and almost no mention of the band name anywhere -- so it's no wonder that most people wouldn't know what this was, even if they saw it in a store. For a near-20-track LP, pretty much everything on here is fairly prime avant-rock; now that I'm finally getting the chance to hear all of this stuff, I'm realizing that this is a band that carried a really high on-base percentage, for sure. Figures that I had to go record shopping in Massachusetts to find out about a Connecticut band.


Bimbo Shrineheads -

"Implosion"

"Slabs"

"How To Get Fucked Up The Ass With a Flag and Smile and Be Really Happy and Grateful"

"Separating Your Face From My Windshield"

The Only Reason I'm Talking To You Is Because I Thought You Were Somebody

This is the third time that I'm posting something from White, meaning that they're tied with Gas Huffer and one ahead of Billy Squier as far as number of appearances on this blog (there may be an award available for this, I'll have to find out). There was a list that appeared about a year ago on Pitchfork or one of those places about "The Best Noise Rock of 2014" or some such, but the guy who wrote the list was going on about stuff on Slumberland and etc; I'm guessing if you held him down and forced him to listen to this track, he'd be in danger of having a seizure. RIYL: White Suns, Landlords, pieces of Black Flag riffs ("Life of Pain") played backwards. The b-side is said to be a single silent groove but I'm not really motivated enough to listen to it.

White -

"Untitled"

Pulling Out Scrabble Letters At Random Just To See If Anything Comes Of It

I can't say too much about Beat Happening, since this is the only record I own by them (what, am I missing something?), although I did just buy the Spit-Take/Sweet Talk split tape which has two Beat Happening covers on it, plus I did read that asshole's book, Our Band Could Be What-The-Fuck-Ever. I didn't lose the sleeve to this single, by the way, it didn't come with one (oh, noes!). Yeah, Sub Pop was a shitty label like that, you can tell why they never went anywhere. I kinda like this song a lot, it reminds me of Panther Burns.

Beat Happening -

"Nancy Sin"

My Foot Is Actually A Size 41807040 If You Count The Planet That I'm Standing On

Figured I'd take a second to throw some people in the direction of this compilation, since '90s punk singles were a small part of what I used to do around here, so I'm guessing that a few of you who read this blog might be interested in this swank little LP for your hi-fi sets. Not that I'm claiming that my blog has anything more than a circumstantial connection to any of the bands that are "Destroy All Art"; I maybe own records from two of the bands that are on here, at most, so this comp digs way underneath what was in your average Mutant Pop or Vital Music mail-order catalogs. No doubt the original 7"-ers that are compiled here instantly tripled in value on Discogs once the track listing of this compilation started spreading around. Speaking of prices, some doof who did a write-up of this comp on Noisey or Vicey or one of those things dropped this brilliant observation, in an attempt to sound knowledgeable: "Typically released in small quantities with little to no promo budget, most ended up in the $3 bins of independent record stores." Dude doesn't know that three bucks was the typical price for a new 7"-er back in the '90s, apparently. (Shoulda put "50 cent bin", which is where most of the singles on VML ended up.) What do chumps on Noisey listen to, anyway? Shit like Thee Oh Sees and Trash Talk and Ceremony, I'll bet. Meanwhile, I'll be over here clutching my LSOK and Stiffs records while the chump on Noisey gets 10000x the readers that my blog gets. Good job, chump.

Pretty Girls -

"The Kids Are All Fucked"

Bend Sinister -

"Firesaw"

I've Been Meaning To Try Harder For At Least A Decade

Carbon 14 was one of those ubiquitous glossy-covered typeset 'fanzines' from back in the '90s that sucked pretty wildly, which I know is my standard reaction to most '90s zines: "it sucked", only this time instead of just relying on my memory I've got a Carbon 14 zine review from an old issue of Brushback to back me up ("used to be when a zine sucked it was a xerox job that only cost 50 cents, now they're all full-blown mags that cost 5 bucks and it's starting to get on my nerves"). One issue of Carbon 14 came with a Chrome Cranks 7" that was so awful that it swore me off everything else by Chrome Cranks from there on out -- I dunno, did I miss anything? I ended up buying one more issue of Carbon 14 after that, which was terrible as well, but the EP that came with it was actually pretty solid, as far as the b-side goes at least. The Ultra Bide track is borderline heavy/insane, and the Cosmic Psychos track -- which I'm sure is the reason why I relented and bought the thing -- is a 'very metal' version of "Back In Town", or "very meht-tahl" as Dee Snider used to say it.

Ultra Bide -

"Kill Me Tender"

Cosmic Psychos -

"B.I.T. (Very Metal)"

Maybe My Life Isn't Perfect But My Hair Is

This is a mix that I posted the other day on Tumblr, which is where I hang out all day now instead of doing something useful. It took me a while before I remembered that I also have a music blog -- although that's a bit of a stretch, as it means you have to count a readership of .001 per day as "having a music blog" -- and so I decided to post it over here as well. This isn't a mix of mostly new tracks, more like just a batch of songs that I've been listening to in the car lately that I thought fit well together, so I made a mix out of them just for ha-ha's. There's even a hidden message involved, although it's probably not that important and besides I totally just forgot what it was anyway.

1. Judas Priest - Delivering The Goods
2. Nasal Boys - Hot Love
3. Bloody Knives - Broken
4. Triage - Triage Theme
5. Chlorine - Power
6. BÄDDAT FÖR TRUBBEL - Inte Varit Sü Tuff
7. Randy Newman - Gone Dead Train
8. Daddy Maxfield - Rave ‘n Rock
9. Thank You Mr. Keating - Gentle Jesus and Drugs
10. Dead at 24 - When Delirium Comes
11. Boulders - Her Taste

Din Wanna Take Out Mix.zip

I Have A Different Definition Of Funny Than Most People

When I heard that there was going to be a new Speaking Canaries LP out on Chunklet, I almost pissed my pants. Not literally, of course (it's not writing* if you're not lying just a little bit), but I was still pretty damn excited. Robert Griffin had mentioned years ago in the liner notes to 97 that there was an unfinished Speaking Canaries LP just laying around somewhere, "scrapped due to lack of funds, and Damon is somewhat ambivalent about completing it", but I'm pretty sure that's not what this is. What this is, in fact, is the first-ever Speaking Canaries recordings from 1990, meaning prior to "The Joy of Wine", even. Now, I love all the Speaking Canaries records as if they were my own children (there's that 'lying' part again), but "Joy of Wine" doesn't represent the best level of rocking out of all of them -- hey, you can't have all five of them be your favorite -- but fear not, "Platter Base Must Be Constructed of Moon Rock" is easily on the level of "Terrestrially Challenged", "Life-Like Homes", and "Get Out Alive" as far as quality-of-rockin' goes. I don't remember hearing any vocals on any of the tracks, which is why they're labeled as demos I guess, but this is definitely not basement-level sonics here. I haven't heard the vinyl yet, which I'm sure sounds amazing, but I was listening to the files in the car and when "Winning Son" came on it just exploded out of the speakers. You may recognize a couple of the song titles from other Speaking Canaries releases ("Toblewee Uslywus", the aforementioned "Winning Son"), but the tracks that I've never heard before or possibly didn't end up as other songs are total fucking hurricanes. "Mitchum Dope", "Hall of Force", etc etc, will all blow your head off like the rotten melon that it is, especially if you dig ROKKK, which I kinda fucking do. *ha ha, I called this writing

I Used To Look Like Sean Penn But Then I Grew Up

You probably haven't been around long enough to know this (I realize not everyone's as old as Tim Hinely), but when bands like Killdozer and Drunks With Guns first started coming out, a few writers took the obvious angle that they were "anti-hardcore bands": like, thrash was supposed to be fast, and these bands were seemingly playing as slow as possible, so they must be trying to sound like the opposite of hardcore, right? I'm not sure if that was really the case (I'm also not sure that Byron Coley actually liked Lost Generation, either, but the review he wrote sure seemed like it), but if Killdozer sounded like anything early-on it was probably like a good American knock-off of the Birthday Party. Although hardcores like myself didn't know it at the time, I mean, who knew about the Birthday Party back then, other than they were some band that Tim Yohannan made fun of once (fuck MRR, too). To me, they just sounded like some cool Wisconsin rock band, contemporaries of Die Kreuzen and Couch Flambeau and Mecht Mensch and so forth. Sounds like a pretty good scene to me. Then Killdozer got older and everyone started liking their Neil Diamond and Black Oak covers, so they started putting one those on every record, which got old really quick and so they descended into some sort of novelty act, like Shel Silverstein does Flipper, or something. This single ("The Pig Was Cool") came out long after they kicked one of the brothers out, which kinda sucked. I've never bothered to listen to the EMF cover on the flipside and I'm not about to start now.

Killdozer -

"The Pig Was Cool"