My Old ATCO Cubicle

Oh, how I miss my cubicle. I hate open office plans, and I always will. So wrongheaded. 

Panorama of a Sloppy Desk

ATCO Sunrise

Farewell, ATCO, and thank you for three and a half years of growth, learning and new experiences. On to the next thing! 

Valentine's is Coming

The Milk Gag

There's a communal fridge at work that contains several cartons of milk, presumably so my colleagues can use it to lighten their coffee. I thought it would be amusing if I bought my own container of milk and then lurked in the coffee room, waiting for someone to appear. Then I would take a hearty swig from the carton, and when they react in horror - "How can you drink from the carton, uggghh!" I'll say "What? I've been doing this since I started here." 

My First NHL Game

Thanks to the generosity of my employer, I was able to enjoy (in my own particular manner) my first ever NHL hockey game. I'm not a sports fan, but I was certainly impressed by the spectacle of (taxpayer-subsidized) Rogers Place and all the high-tech tomfoolery that surrounds the hockey game itself. The scoreboard hanging over the ice is massive, with utterly spectacular resolution; I marvelled at it the whole game. Technicians can project whatever they want onto the ice, such as the team logos seen in this image. During the game I suggested to Sean that a clever coach would project additional hockey pucks onto the ice to confuse enemy players. I'd laugh and laugh!

Seeing a game live has not transformed me into a hockey fan, and as ever I feel sad that I can't share the heightened emotions of the real fans as they watch. As with my apathy toward children and pets, I seem to be lacking certain common human instincts. Instead, I find myself analyzing the non-stop assault on the senses that occurs during the game; except when the players are actually playing, music blares from all sides, animation lights up the rink and the electronic billboards circling the stands, and propaganda films play on the scoreboard. Indeed, the hidden ringmaster exhorts the crowd to "GET LOUD" at various points during the game, and the crowds dutifully agree. I was reminded yet again how easy it is to manipulate crowds with words, images and sounds. We are so easily programmed, and I'm certainly not excepting myself; I just respond to different programming languages.

Part of me realizes this is all (relatively) harmless fun, but another part of me sees in this kind of event a more refined version of the old gladiatorial arena. I guess you can call this progress, though, as no one dies and the violence is punished rather than rewarded (textually; the subtext is something else again).

I'd never willingly pay to see a hockey game, but I'm glad I had the opportunity to see one simply so that I can better understand what moves other people.

Jungle Kirk Hunt

Chandler on Bricks

iMac Flashbac

Here I am sometime in the late 90s working on one of the first iMacs; this one was aqua-coloured. Presumably I was ghostwriting one gardening book or another. My desk at ATCO is even messier than this. Bruce or Jim probably shot the photo; I was trying to finish a roll of black and white. Yes, this was shot...on film. 

3 Years and Counting

Goolllllld

Tonight our ATCO Electric/ATCO Power trivia team earned 77 points to earn gold medals at the 2016 Corporate Challenge Team Trivia event. I don't think I've won a medal since...grade 9, maybe? If not earlier. 

I was lucky enough to be on a team with a broad knowledge base. If it had been up to me to answer the sports and leisure questions, we would have been in big trouble, for example. But I pulled my weight in the pop culture, science and Western categories. 

Red-Nosed with Laughter

Earlier today I noticed an orange sticker on the ceiling above my cubicle.

"What's this orange sticker?" I asked, pointing to it even though no one was watching or listening. If I squinted, I thought I could make out the old Edmonton Telephones logo.

I stood in the doorway of my cubicle for a better look. At that moment, one of my colleagues passed by.

"Can you read that?" I asked.

"Property of Edmonton Telephones," she answered.

Vindication! Then I noticed that my co-worker seemed to be heading home a little early.

"Are you leaving us?" I asked.

"Doctor's appointment," she said. "I've been waiting two months to see this person."

"Have fun," I said, returning to my cubicle. Then, after she left, I reconsidered my statement.

"I suppose you're not likely to have fun at the doctor," I said, beginning to chuckle, "Unless she's a Doctor of Clown Studies!"

I barely managed to squeak out the punchline over my hysterical laughter, though my remaining co-workers did not seem amused. 

Cowboy Brain Freeze

Despite earning just 4 out of 20 points in the opening Sports & Leisure round, Maegan, Kristen, Arlene and I did well enough in successive rounds to score a cumulative 60 out of 100 points, good enough for 17th place out of 80 teams. 

Rejected Corporate Challenge Team Trivia Names

For the third time I'll be participating in the Edmonton Corporate Challenge Brain Freeze event. Since this year Corporate Challenge takes on a Western theme, I suggested several team names to my ATCO teammates:

The Magnificent Four
A Fistful of Trivia
A Team Called Horse
Little Big Team
Rio Saskatchewan
Electric Stagecoach
The Mild Bunch
Sober Noon
False Grit
The Team That Shot Liberty Valence
They Lost With Their Boots On

...and the winner...

The Good, the Bad, and the Trivial.

Livin' in a Box

80s Halloween Flashback

Deactivated Listening

I've been taking a Foundations of Leadership course through Mount Royal University, and the course ended today with The Art of Listening. Today's class included practice in active listening techniques, which reminded me of an embarrassing incident from my past...

During either Math or Science class in Grade 10 or 11, my friend and next door neighbour Keith Gylander was speaking to me. For some reason, I tuned out completely and turned to look the other way.

"Earl, I'm still talking," Keith said dryly, and my attention snapped back to him. I was utterly embarrassed, and to this day I can't remember what could have possessed me to be so rude. I certainly wasn't listening actively - or at all! 

Dreaming of Release

Last night I dreamed my boss asked me to write a press release about the re-opening of the original Gaiety Theatre in Leduc. I wasn’t sure what the re-opening had to do with our work, but I dutifully wrote the release. Instead of e-mailing it to news outlets, I had to carry the release to the top of a transmission tower and hang it there for broadcast.

I made the climb with no safety equipment whatsoever, but at least it was a gorgeous, sunny evening. The press release itself was framed in this metal thingamajig I had to hook to the top of the tower. That part went without a hitch; there was a hook on the tower obviously meant for the press release holder.

I was pretty amazed by the technology of the release itself; the tower radiated waves that beamed the print on the release out to recipients all over the globe. I waited around to watch the sun set, and felt guilty that I’d failed my duty to refuse unsafe work.

I didn’t experience the climb back down in my dream; I just found myself in the theatre getting popcorn and looking for a seat. It didn’t look like a lot of money had been spent on renovations, but I was happy to be there. My ran into my friend Pete in the aisle; he was carrying a giant soda, about twice the size of a 7-11 Big Gulp. The theatre was packed beyond capacity.

I was talking to Pete when suddenly everyone started screaming; they were pointing at something on the screen. I started to turn my head to see what it was, and caught a glimpse of something nightmarish and otherworldly emerging from the screen, some formless horror from beyond space and time.

I woke up at that point. I’m annoyed that I missed the movie, whatever it was.

@CO

@CO: We Make "At" Signs.

Workplace humour, arr arr. Works nicely for Twitter, though. 

Year Two