Forgiveness.....................

 

Christianity places forgiveness at the very center of man’s relationship to God, as an unmerited gift. Taken to heart, this can’t help but color our dealings with one another. The thing about forgiveness is that it is always unmerited. It is a renunciation on the part of the one who offers it, a turning-away from pride that opens a kind of manger in the heart. It is a humble place where something new arrives and we turn toward it. A birth.

-Matthew B. Crawford, from here

accidentally...............................

     As we develop love, appreciation, and forgiveness for others over time, we may accidentally develop those things towards ourselves, too.  While you might think it's a trick, having affection for one's goofy, crabby, annoying, lovely self is home.  This has been my meager salvation.

     That we are designed for joy is exhilarating, within reach, now or perhaps later today, after a nap, as long as we do not mistake excitement for joy.  Joy is good cheer.  My partner says joy and curiosity are the same thing.  Joy is always a surprise, and often a decision.

-Anne Lamott, Almost Everything: Notes on Hope

On friendly relations with some old friends....

      For let me tell you that since my arrival in Rome I have re-established friendly relations with some old friends - my books.  I had ceased associating with them, not because I found them annoying but because they made me slightly ashamed.  For having plunged into the middle of the most turbulent happenings in highly untrustworthy company, I felt I had not sufficiently followed the advice the books had given me.  But they forgive me . . .

-Marcus Tullius Cicero, from a letter written to Marcus Terentius Varro in 46 B.C.

We're a strange breed.....................

  Consider the state of social media, where people frequently go in order to find something to be angry about, so that they can express their anger in ways that would typically be forbidden but are permissible in cases only of having been wronged. Had the social media user not sought out an example of someone doing something offensive or outrageous, they wouldn’t have anger to discharge, but it seems to me that acquiring anger and the right to discharge it is precisely the point. (Cable TV also offers you lots of reasons to get pissed off at people and yell at them.)

-Elizabeth Bruenig, from this longish essay on forgiveness

via

re-contextualized..................

      A key to making Love unconditional is the willingness to forgive.  With forgiveness, events and people are re-contextualized as simply "limited"—not "bad" or "unlovable."  With humility we are willing to relinquish our perception of a past event.

-David Hawkins, Letting Go: The Pathway Of Surrender

No trophy...................

 There’s no trophy for holding the longest grudge but the way some people act you’d think there was. And that’s sad because forgiveness is pretty amazing.

-Eric Barker, from this post

Respect......................

 Go out of your way to find humility when things are going right and forgiveness/compassion when they go wrong.  Because it's never as good or as bad as it looks.  The world is big and complex.  Luck and risk are both real and hard to identify.  Do so when judging yourself and others.  Respect the power of luck and risk and you'll have a better chance of focusing on the things you can actually control.  You'll also have a better chance of finding the right role models.

-Morgan Housel, The Psychology of Money:  Timeless Lessons On Wealth, Greed, And Happiness

Freed.............................

"Refusal to forgive leads to a self-imposed imprisonment.  It's time we freed ourselves by letting old pain dissipate into the darkness, so that new opportunities can take us to greater heights of joy."

-Marc & Angel Chernoff,  1000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently

Some days......................

Not every day is going to  turn out the way we want it to.  All routines and to-do lists are aspirational.  "You go diving for pearls," said Jerry Garcia, "but sometimes you end up with clams.

The important thing is to make it to the end of the day, no matter what.  No matter how bad it gets, see it through to the end so you can get to tomorrow.  After spending the day with his five-year-old son, Nathaniel Hawthorne wrote in his diary, "We got rid of the day as well as we could."  Some days you just have to get rid of as best as you can.

When the sun goes down and you look back on the day, go easy on yourself.  A little self-forgiveness goes a long way.  Before you go to bed, make a list of everything you did accomplish, and write down a list of what you want to get done tomorrow.  Then forget about it.  Hit the pillow with a clear mind.  Let your subconscious work on stuff while you're sleeping.

A day that seems a waste now might turn out to have a purpose or use or beauty to it later on.

-Austin Kleon,  Keep Going:  10 Ways To Stay Creative In Good Times And Bad

Love..................................

But the world's problems are very simple.  They are the lack of love between human beings, the lack of compassion, of tolerance, of humility, and of acceptance.  They are the arrogance, hatred, and violence that have polluted human hearts.  They are prejudice and intolerance.  If a person has no peace in their heart, there can be no peace around them.  Such a person will always find a reason to argue and fight.  Only when a person's own heart is peaceful can their interactions be peaceful.
     How to solve the problem of hatred?  Is there any political solution?  Can love and acceptance be legislated and enforced?  Can any law change the human heart?   The heart only changes when it decides to change.  And that is a personal choice that each person must make for themselves.  We cannot enforce it upon them.  We can only inspire them and offer them the tools.
     Therefore, rather than trying to transform others, let us devote ourselves to our own transformation.  As for others, let us be nondemanding of them.  Let us be content to love them as they are, to accept them as they are, and to be ever ready to serve them as we would members of our own family.  This is the humanity that the world sorely needs.
     Only love can make it possible to accept another person's flaws.  Have you ever seen a mother give up on her children?  Even if her child constantly misbehaves, getting thrown out of school or worse, the mother remains by their side, even after everyone else is fed up.  This is due to the mother's love.  Where there is love, there is forgiveness.  Where there is love, there is compassion.
Love is the root of every noble quality.  Therefore, when there is love, do you need any other quality?  When love is present, acceptance, forgiveness, and compassion all become redundant.  Love alone is sufficient.  No other quality is required.  We all know this.  The great teachers of the past and present have all said so.  But if teachings were enough, wouldn't we be transformed by now?

-Kamlesh D. Patel and Joshua Pollock,  The Heartfulness Way:  Heart-Based Mediations for Spiritual Transformation

recognize and forgive......................

     Whenever I go to the funeral of someone I have known well, I marvel at the image of that person that is portrayed in the eulogy.   Seldom does their imperfect humanity survive the idealized descriptions that, while meant to comfort, succeed only in sanitizing the life of the deceased.  To know someone fully and love them in spite of, even because of, their imperfections is an act that requires us to recognize and forgive, two very important indicators of emotional maturity.  More important is the fact that, if we can do this for other people, we may be able to do it for ourselves.

-Gordon Livingston,  Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart:  Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now

Godkin on McKinley.....................

"Every one who believes in the divine government of the world must believe that God will eventually take up the case of fellows who set unnecessary wars on foot, and I hope he won't forgive them."

Edwin Lawrence Godkin, as cut and pasted from his Life and Letters.

THE question........................................

...................................................of our age.  Do follow the link, and, please, take the time to read Sullivan's essay.   I'd call it mighty important.   A few wee excerpts:


The project of American democracy — to live beyond such tribal identities, to construct a society based on the individual, to see ourselves as citizens of a people’s republic, to place religion off-limits, and even in recent years to embrace a multiracial and post-religious society — was always an extremely precarious endeavor.


Tribalism, it’s always worth remembering, is not one aspect of human experience. It’s the default human experience. It comes more naturally to us than any other way of life. For the overwhelming majority of our time on this planet, the tribe was the only form of human society.

Perhaps I’m biased because I’m an individual by default. I’m gay but Catholic, conservative but independent, a Brit but American, religious but secular. What tribe would ever have me? I may be an extreme case, but we all are nonconformist to some degree. Nurturing your difference or dissent from your own group is difficult; appreciating the individuality of those in other tribes is even harder. It takes effort and imagination, openness to dissent, even an occasional embrace of blasphemy.

And, at some point, we also need mutual forgiveness.

Civilized...................................

“To accept injury without a spirit of savage resentment - to show ourselves merciful toward those who wrong us - being a source of good hope to them - is characteristic of a benevolent and civilized way of life.” 

-Gaius Musonius Rufus

cartoon via

Spengler knows some things too...........

The best solution is a compromise which removes the issue from politics altogether. ... That won't do much good, but there isn't much good to be done. The best outcome would be to defuse the issue, and hope that people can walk away from it and get back to the business of getting an education and making a living. Nothing will console Southerners for their defeat in the Civil War; nothing will compensate African-Americans for hundreds of lost years. The best anyone can do is to find a way to live with it and get on with life.

-as he concludes this blog post

Dappled....................................

“Feeling offended is invigorating. Feeling offended is a reassuring sensation. It's easier than asking ourselves if the redeeming love of God is evident in the way we communicate with people.”

“We probably ought to be careful about deciding we're feeling offended; it can get old after a while. We become offended in all the ways God isn't. The seat of offendedness (like the seat of judgment) can be a real tricky spot to occupy. Before we know it, it can become a twenty-four-hour-a-day job. It becomes all we're known for, and when we're all caught up in all the things we're against, we forget the beauty of the things we're supposed to be for. We forget what the kingdom of God looks like and all the wonderfully odd characters taking up residence there. We forget to revel in dappled things. We forget we're dappled.” 

-David Dark

thanks

No cause.......................

There is no "cause" of emotions except from within.  To see this fact results in empowerment, autonomy, and release from the illusion of victimhood.

     Inner peace automatically arises out of our willingness to give up certain positionalities, such as judging others and making them "wrong".  Willingness stems from a forgiving, understanding position.  Judgmentalism does not really solve anything but instead adds to the problem.  Making others wrong results in a world of lose-lose.

-David R. Hawkins, as extracted from Healing and Recovery

the real questions.................................

"Did I offer peace today? Did I bring a smile to someone's face? Did I say words of healing? Did I let go of my anger and resentment? Did I forgive? Did I love?' These are the real questions. I must trust that the little bit of love that I sow now will bear many fruits, here in this world and the life to come."


-attributed to Henri Nouwen


via

Healing................................

.............................is available via simple acts of humanity.

Over and over again.................