RIP Sweetiepie the hen

RIP Sweetiepie the  Hen. Over 10 years old, an ex battery hen who came to us aged about 2 1/2 years old 







and who has been the top hen ever since. She has survived 8 fox attacks ( several seriously injuring her) and led hens to safety many times. She also lead them into committing much mischief! Here she lead a daring raid into the house :) 




 She reared the Sweetie 6 ( Dorkings) as well as other broods of chicks and was always an excellent mum





and through out her long life she was a firm but fair top hen. This is Sweetie a few weeks ago.

For the last 5 years she was  always accompanied by her good friend Henny; the two of them went round together at all times and slept in one nestbox for company. Henny is the large black rock hen standing behind Sweetiepie 

Sweetie died this evening while I was at a meeting; I checked her before I left and it was obvious she was fading fast but was sat next to Henny. Henny was preening her feathers and crooning to her. I thought about ending her life then but as she did not seem in obvious pain I decided to check again when I got home.  On my return I found them together; Sweetie having just died and Henny sheltering her still warm body under her large black glossy wing (as hens do to their chicks) .

  

I will always remember Sweetie. for her bravery and her fair way of being Top Hen. For her dedication to rearing and protecting her chicks and most of all for sitting on my lap and crooning at me.

RIP Sweetie. Much missed already xxx

A sad day and a lot of cooking.

Feel ridiculously energetic today despite still having a very bad back ache and sciatica. I was going to go to Ledbury this afternoon but we got sad news that Bob, the lovely horse Compostgirl learnt to ride on at the stables just up the lane (and her first love) had to be pts today

He was an absolute sweety; a really kind and gentle horse who has taught so many children in the area to ride. He will be sorely missed :(

RIP Bob

Compostgirl was very upset by this news so I decided to not go out, so as to be here for when she got home from school.

I came away with a huge haul of reduced items from my shopping trip to the Co Op yesterday .

and so I made good use of them this afternoon! I did lots of cooking, made a huge pan of BNS curry; also BNS curry soup and a huge pan of veg soup.

 And a tray of mashed swede and carrot for the freezer.

We ate BNS curry for dinner tonight , the others had rice and naan with theirs.

and three more large portions are now in the freezer, as well as 20 portions of various soups, two portions of curry sauce, 20 portions of mashed swede and two portions of roasted sweet potato.

Compostman and Compostgirl then went to Archery but as my back hurts I stayed at home and did some mending and tidying and then watched "Avengers Assemble" again :)

The weekend starts and farewell Blondin the cockerel.

 Beautiful day here today, fine and sunny and warm with a hint of a breeze.

I did the usual jobs and spent the morning pricking out brassica plants. After lunch Compostman and I went up the road to Hellens Manor to set up the stall for this weekend's The Garden Festival. I and fellow Master Composters are on a stall all weekend, promoting home composting but because I am the one organising our stall I needed to take compost bin, wormery, display boards etc etc and set up at the site.

The organisers are a lovely group of people; the whole event is one I love to attend and Hellens Manor is a delightful place with fabulous grounds and house. One event I always look forward to doing!

We set up and chatted and enjoyed the sunshine and then, with the stall sorted out as much as I could, we came back home. I will be there from 9 am until early evening, both days this weekend.

Later on though, my evening took on a sadder note as I had to dispatch Blondin. He was a magnificent specimen of a cockerel and very attentive to the girls but very noisy, even by cockerel standards and he also kept on leading the hens down the Wood, into fox danger. So for several months I have been trying to re home him but with no joy. He had also begun to be a bit more aggressive towards us.

Tonight though over the space of an hour he launched a series of unprovoked attacks on me and despite repeatedly being cowed, he kept coming back at me, chasing after me and attacking my back. When I got him in the hen run  he repeatedly flew at my face with spurs and claws outstretched. If I had not taken evasive action he would have injured me I have no doubt, as he had already injured my leg and arm.  I cannot have that sort of behaviour in any animal we keep, and so I quickly caught him (and have the further scars to show for it!) and without further ado killed him.

I hate doing that. I really really do hate it but this was beyond the usual posturing  I would expect from a Cockerel. Blondin had been getting more and more aggressive to all of us over the last couple of weeks and tonight the level of aggression went way over what I was prepared to accept. Poor Blondin.

So, a mixed sort of day here at Compost Mansions. I hope the weekend goes better.

15 th April, whatever year it is, it is a bad day..

Today, 25 years ago this morning at 6.30 was the anniversary of my Mother dying. I am an Owl not a Lark but on this day I always wake early, so today I was up at 6 am and by 6.30 am was out planting, composting and growing stuff, with Cassi Cat, the feathery gang and some tea-and-marmite-toast to keep me company.

My way of coping.

Everyone else was (quite sensibly!) still asleep - but not me. I cannot sleep in on this day.


I find this date very upsetting and sad, but I cannot escape this day even if I did want to (not that I do want to IYKWIM) as it is also is the day 96 people died at Hillsborough for a still not yet established set of situations. I will just say - my heart goes out to all of those involved    - and 25 years is FAR TOO LONG to find out what really happened to your loved ones..

But obviously I personally cannot get away from this date as the media reminds me every year. Even if my own internal clock did not.

Today, (insert number of years ago here) my Mother died. I was only 26 when it first happened - now I am 51 and in a week or so will be 52. It hurts, every day. Some days more than others. Today is a bad day as it is an anniversary of her death.

Despite the difficulties this day presents -  and other various family stuff  happening as well (which seems is not going to change, sadly!) I have had as good a day as I could - helped by getting my hands very soil-y with planting and growing and nurturing. I also was helped in my distressed state by being able to spend an hour sitting in the wood, meditating, listening to the birdsong and just being. I am so blessed that I can have the luxury to do this.

I went down to the log circle mid morning  as I really felt I needed some help with how I felt and hoped for some renewal and healing. After the last few days which have been rather fraught, I needed it. I lost track of time - thought I was sitting there for maybe 10 mins? - was actually more like an hour. I think this was healing time for me and certainly I felt much calmer afterwards.

I wish those who were robbed of their loved ones at the Hillsborough disaster could find such peace. Sadly, I fear not.

RIP Mango

Sadly yesterday Mango the very poorly Guinea Pig was found to have diabeties. We took her  to our vets  where she stayed in overnight and had blood and urine tests. Sadly she was found to be diabetic but the prognosis was not good and we agreed she was too poorly to survive  :( and so it was decided it would be most kind if she was  put to sleep, saving her any more suffering

If she had been younger, maybe she would have had a better chance , but as an already elderly rescue guinea pig  sadly it was not to be.

RIP Mango lovely piggie.

The passing of time and the start of wisdom?

Today when Simon the Postman arrived I was called to the door to sign for a recorded delivery letter.

This makes my heart sink, as in the past for me it has nearly always heralded some sort of bad news ( a death, a parking fine, some legal issue  - that sort of stuff ) Only occasionally has it been good stuff ( like the recent arrival of my Food Hygiene certificate, following on from my Outdoor Food Handling Course)

Anazingly today it held a substantial ( well it was by my standards) cheque and a gold wedding ring - a bequest from my late, much loved Aunt Betty, who died a few months ago.

This triggered an interesting discussion with Compostgirl about inheritance laws, burials, funeral rites, my jewelry box contents, our family tree and the Arts and Crafts movement.

Not sure what I will do with the money but I am NOT using it to just pay everyday bills - I will use it for something special, something I can look at or experience and think about and remember my lovely Aunty Betty, who was a Mum to me after my Mum went into Hospital when I was 11, never to return to me at home again.

After all this, as I had my jewelry box open I sorted out a lot of silver and gold jewelry ( with Compostgirl joining in) which I DO NOT want to keep as they have nothing but unhappy memories for me, and I am going to sell them for what I can get and buy something I do value with the money.

At nearly 52 years old I have finally decided I am not going to keep stuff that makes me feel uncomfortable or unhappy. Despite who gave it to me and however much I loved them, once.

Is this the start of wisdom? I do hope so :)

Part of my letting go of the past in 2014 process

RIP Titch

Sadly Titch the rescue hen*, died last night. 


She had recovered well from wandering off into the wood overnight while ill, a subsequent chest infection and she settled into several weeks as a House Hen, under careful treatment and care. But, she also went blind and largely stopped eating despite my best efforts to help her by putting her in a carefully designed small indoor run, with food and drink always in the same place and with me feeding her by hand, many times a day.

An extra job but one I did not begrudge her as she deserved every possible chance to enjoy her life And I loved her

She finally had what looked like a heart attack last night, not long after I said goodnight and stroked her head and crooned at her - she purred back at me as usual

(* ex so called "enriched" or barn " caged hen)

RIP Nutmeg Hen - who laid down her life in defence of her chicks.

I write this post with enormous sadness but also enormous admiration.

Nutmeg Hen, the elderly "generic ginger hybrid"  hen, all broodiness supposed to be bred out of her, went broody for the very first time a few months back and, as regular readers may remember, I put some fertile eggs under her. And they hatched! 

She was the most attentive Mother Hen I have ever seen, really astonishingly devoted to her two chicks and her devotion showed in their rapid growth -

they look at least two weeks older than they actually are, due to her good feeding and care.



I took this photo of them all on the chicks 7 week birthday, and am very proud of it.

But it is a bittersweet feeling as later that same afternoon I found the two chicks cowering under a bush crying disconsolately for Nutmeg, who was nowhere to be seen or heard. The Younger Hens were squawking and scanning the skies nervously, in a way that I knew meant "airborne trouble" -  they do this for planes, crows, buzzards and hawks in general. The old ex batt Gang Hens (now sadly down to just two members, Babs and Bunty) were muttering worriedly, whilst hiding deep under a Rose of Sharon bush - their favourite place to flee when scared.

I looked around and eventually found a pile of ginger and white feathers near the Broody Ark along with a few black feathers from Blackie the Copper Marans chick.

Nutmeg was gone.

I am guessing from the feathers ( and a bald patch on Blackie's back) that a Buzzard swooped down on Blackie and Nutmeg tried to defend her chick and so was taken, instead.


As I posted on my personal Facebook Wall

"RIP Nutmeg Hen, brave and loyal girl, last surviving member of the original Spice Girl gang of five, survivor of 5 fox attacks, Top Hen who ruled with a velvet claw and a kind "cluck"

who gave up her life today to defend her two chicks."


In the aftermath the chicklets were very distressed, crying out and looking around for Nutmeg, and I had the problem of where to put them to be warm and safe without her.  I could not give them to one of the other hens to foster as hens do not work that way, instead of mothering them, they would attack the chicklets. So the rest of the afternoon was spent re arranging various runs and houses and the chicklets were moved into a large run with the Eglu attached, as it is the most insulated house. 

I think it was one of "our" Buzzards who must have taken Nutmeg  as I heard a lot of commotion earlier on, then went out and found the two chicks calling in distress and no Nutmeg, just the few feathers. All the other hens were all hiding under things and this makes me think Buzzard rather than Fox, as when it is Fox all the hens tend to go up things.


At least the chicklets know how to feed themselves and are so big and strong and well feathered that they are ok without a Hen to brood them any more.

 Nutmeg's legacy of strong, healthy chicklets. But, such a shame :(

RIP Tiny Hen

RIP Tiny Hen :( 

She died in her sleep this morning :-(  She didn't look poorly last night, just a bit tired with the heat. I think she may have been trying to lay an egg and just died. She looked very peaceful.

I am making a new flower bed full of bee attracting flowers and she (her ashes) has been buried in the middle of it.

Tiny Hen, small but top hen in every way. She was still terrorising the cats and trying to get into the house yesterday

 This is what she looked like back in March 2012

Tiny Hen became a house hen  this time last year, she became very weak and was being bullied by the others to the point of terror and had stopped eating or drinking. I brought her inside and gave her food, water, love and cuddles. Gradually she recovered and grew her feathers back and became a very feisty, bold little hen:)

Tiny Hen was rescued from an "Barn" system, so she  lived crowded together with thousands of other hens, under artificial light, inside a huge shed. Never seeing daylight or going outside. "Colony"  or "Enriched"  eggs mean the hens are also shut  inside a small cage, inside the huge shed.

If you do buy free range eggs already  - Babs, Bunty, Titch, and Marjoram the ex battery hen thank you from the bottom of their hearts , as do I.

If you don't - please - for the sake of hens like Babs, Bunty, Titch and all their sister hens still in barns and cages - switch to buying free range eggs - it is the only way to make sure that the eggs you buy come from hens that have had a reasonable life. 

Tiny Hen was very sweet, I loved her a lot and I am very sad that she has died, but I am very happy to have given her 15 months of freedom, love, friendship and sunshine.

RIP little hen, fly high and free.

Thank you for reading :-)

RIP Yarrow Hen

RIP Yarrow Hen, who died yesterday evening. She had a good life, well lived. With us she had had 18 months of freedom, after her 18 months in the cruel battery cages.

As those of you who have followed my blog since 2012 will know,  Yarrow was a very special girl; even amongst hens who are ALL special to us, she was a little star. I  am very sad to lose her and miss her hugely, already.

She had been "winding down" for a few months and I am so glad she had a really good last day in the sun; sitting on my lap and being cuddled and told how much I loved her; sitting on the ground in the sunshine soaking up the rays; being cuddled by her flock who all came and collapsed all around her as only hens can do. 

Despite all this, and despite having a normal morning yesterday, by  the afternoon Yarrow was obviously suffering  (not able to walk around, deep purple coloured comb, gasping, not able to eat even the treat of unlimited mealworms). 

I can normally dispatch chickens who are in distress or injured but  this time I found myself unable to kill my pet hen Yarrow, for which I feel ashamed (as I should have been able to help her when she was suffering, but could not). So, I quickly took Yarrow down to Mike our Vet, who agreed her time had come, due to a  combination of failing heart/old age, and who ended her suffering kindly and quickly.

Mike, who as a newly qualified Vet helped Yarrow to recover from a broken leg during his first few weeks at our local practice, has been such a help over the last 18 months.  With all the issues the ex battery hens in my little flock have had, especially Yarrow, he has been such a help, for which  I thank him so much. And I especially thank him for his kindness and understanding as to why I was crying over the death of what many people might dismiss as "just a hen". He was lovely, as are all the staff at our local Veterinary  Surgery. We are very lucky with them.

We buried Yarrow hen  in the wood today, in the place where many other feathery friends are also buried. She liked to furtle around in the wood and it seems a good place for her remains to be buried. I heard my first Skylark of 2013 as we were filling in the hole. Appropriate, I felt.

Fly high, little Yarrow hen and know you are missed and were very loved indeed.

Fox attack, again.

Have just come inside after burying 8 hens in the wood. One other hen is MIA, presumed eaten by the foxes who killed the other hens. Remaining 3 live hens (Yarrow, Marjoram and Nutmeg) are rather traumatised and unhappy.

We have never  lost so many to the fox in one go before, we had 5 taken in one go a few years back  but this was worse as only one hen was taken and the rest were hidden in the wood ditch for us to find - really  horrible to see :-(
2 of the "new" ex batts survived - Yarrow ( aka Limpy Hen) and Marjoram, also Nutmeg hen, because she is an escapologist hen and was in the garden rather than with the others. And I now only have ginger hens, - all my other coloured pure breeds and hybrid girls died.

I am SO sad, I am still crying now. Burying them was horrible. Especially Comfrey, Cumin and Marigold the ex batts. I felt I had let them all down, somehow. :-((((( by not protecting them enough from foxes.

RIP Lavender, Treacle, Cocoa, Cumin, Comfrey aka Flappy hen, Marigold, Pearl and Opal hens. I shall miss your feathery antics enormously.

(update Sweetie re appeared the next day!) 

RIP Coriander Hen

Coriander Hen died :-(

She had been poorly  since Sat, and had been living inside in a cosy box in our kitchen. She seemed to have improved a lot yesterday and I was quite hopeful she would recover. But then she died this morning.

I am very sad :-( But I am mainly sad because I thought I had managed to get her well again, only to have her die, which is the really sad bit - after all she would have been dead 2 years ago if I had not got hold of her
f rom the free range egg farm.

She was an ex commercial ginger hybrid hen who, because I took her on, had nearly 2 more years of a good life, so really it is not too sad that her life has finally come to a natural end iyswim

She was not an ex battery hen, no...but an ex commercial free range hen ( oh yes, THEY need the same rescue plan as well as ex battery hens - they get killed at 12 -18 months as well...but sadly are often overlooked because of the even worse plight of their ex battery hen sisters.) 

And actually ex free range hens don't neccessarily have that much better a life! OK they are not imprisoned in an A4 sized cage, but still can have had a very limited life and indeed Coriander was in a terrible state when we got her.

But...what a 2 years of extra life she got! Living with us,  in a wood, life of riley ( who WAS he?) , petted, loved and pampered....chasing cats and squirrels, dust bathing, raids into the house, raids into the veg patch - what a great life...

She has been buried on the edge of the wood in a place she used to like to dustbathe.

RIP Coriander hen - much missed, never forgotten

Horrible , horrible start to Sat morning....

I have only just felt able to blog about all this, as it was so very upsetting . A stray dog came into the garden early on Sat morning (before 7 am) - we were woken up at about 7 am by the barking, which came from behind the house...

so went out to see what was going on - the dog ran off before we could see it but it had managed to scrabble open the pet rabbits and guinea pigs hutches and killed the rabbits and guinea pigs...fortunately it had not mangled them but just broken their necks - I guess by throwing them around a bit...  

The hens were also very upset as the dog (not any of the neighbours dogs, they are all locked up at night and definitely not a fox) had been scrabbling and digging around the hen house but could not get in.

Cassi and Tabitha cats were very distressed by the commotion and  Tom Cat was missing as well all morning which was VERY worrying - he turned up about 11 .30, all upset and fluffed up - I guess he went out to look at what was going on and got chased...

Have warned our farming neighbours - they have small pets, hens etc also sheep....
 
Not a nice way to start the day Burying small pets, with a weeping Compostgirl at our side......not nice at all.

A SAD and REALLY rubbish sort of day..

Carp morning of utter carpness here, topped off with a second and third helping of even more carpness later in the afternoon...

I am rather sadly minus 6 hens today..a visit from Mr/Mrs/Miss/Master Fox,I think alas ....

I realised something was up after spotting a load of white feathers at lunchtime, searched for a body and found one dead hen( head removed and gone)who was Pearl the nutty White Leghorn, her decapitated body was still warm....

then gradually realised a number of the other hens were MIA... all this in daytime! near to the house!

Henny my biggest, softest, oldest hen, Ginger, Cinnamon the two newish Isa browns ( and ace layers), Bunty the newish Black Rock and another sweet hen, and Ruby the mad broody Silver Dorking, mum to the Legbars.....were all missing....

Not a feather anywhere from any of them, but no sight or sound all day so am assuming they have been got by (probably) a vixen and her teenage cubs....

Am very sad and dispirited by it all....

Have been to pub tonight, eaten and drunk far too much, have returned to open a bottle of wine, have watched "The day after tomorrow" and am going to go to bed soon..


My poor , poor hens......I shall miss you all SO much.

RIP my lovely feather friends.

Yet more sad stuff, just before Christmas...farewell to Kitty Cat

Yet more sad stuff here, I have a catch up post about the Festive Season, but first I want to tell you all about Kitty Cat.

Lovely old Kitty Cat reached the end of the road and took his last journey to the Vets on the Saturday before Christmas.

The poor old lad could hardly walk and had become unable to even get out through the cat flap to have a wee, so had taken to just going on the carpet. And as he has never used a litter tray (never learnt how to ..always went outside) there was not a lot we could do to help him.

He went from a strong, if a bit wobbly on his legs, old cat...to looking terrible in the last few days of his life. CM and I have been having "the conversation" several times that week as to if it was "time" but had decided he was still getting some good quality of life..but the last 2 days changed all that...

poor old lad, he looked so uncomfortable....couldn't even groom himself and fell over when he tried the last couple of days :-(

Holly the vet agreed he looked in a very poor way, she offered us the option of yet more tests etc but he had already been down that route earlier this year, was on lots of medication for Kidney and joint problems and was still going downhill fast...and had also started to be incontinent .....AND it would have meant an overnight (at least) stay in the vets, which distressed him hugely last time....so we declined to do any more prodding or poking of him. At 18, he had had enough....

As it was he had a nice last day lying on a cushion by the Aga being stroked and loved and fed cheese and other titbits, then he went quietly to sleep at the vets with CM stroking his head...

So...Tom and Tabitha have sniffed Kitty Cat's body so know he is gone on ahead...and he has been buried in the wood near the pool, a place where he loved to hunt for rabbits...he was a MIGHTY fine hunter until a year ago! Full grown cock pheasants, rabbits, adult rats, squirrels, moles, bats..you name it he could catch it and he never played with his food, as a serious hunter he killed it and ate it!

and there is much sadness around here as we have lost two beloved cats in less than two weeks.....

Farewell, old friend, there is a very large hole where you used to be....

:-(

Am very sad here..

Am very sad here..

Just after Compostman left to take Compostgirl to Brownies, at 6.15 a knock on the door was followed by a man saying he had found a cat in the road...it further transpired that his car had hit Sidney our lovely cat outside our house.

The man ( all credit for having the guts to tell me what had happened, and not just drive off...)
had brought Sid in to the garden, so I rushed inside to get a solid board, towel and warm blanket, plus phone..we lifted Sid ( who was alive but not moving) onto the board, and I covered him up and went inside to phone the vet...

I got Sid (on the board, wrapped up) into my car and sped to the vets, ..at 6 30 pm he was given oxygen..at 8 pm a phone call told me he was stable, seemed to have a broken pelvis from the initial X ray but his breathing was still worrying them...but they could see no major, other injuries...so we were all happy and I was telling a distraught CG that maybe Sid might be OK, eventually....

but as the vet was talking to me there was a shout for her as he had stopped breathing...and when she called me back 5 min later it was with the news that he had stopped breathing and despite CPR, had died....

CG is over come with grief..we are numb with shock..Sid was the rescue young cat we got last year..after the Monty puss shaped hole had ceased to hurt quite so badly..he was lovely, friendly, a character and so motherly to the 2 kittens Tom and Tabitha...


RIP Sidney Puss, we will ALL miss you so very much.....

RIP Violet Dorking

I WAS hoping to post nice stuff about my 4 new POL pullets today, but I have sadder news.

I went out last night to lock in the girls and I couldn't find Violet Dorking. I looked all over the hen paddock...and found her dead under the conifer where the girls have their dust baths.

On checking her over this morning, she seems to have died of a broken neck.

She was being bullied by EVERYONE Tuesday morning and I spent a fair bit of time trying to sort it all out and put her back inside Cluckingham Palace for safely, but she was too frightened and wouldn't let me. She went and hid in the branches of the conifer instead, which was a safe place for her to be so I left her to hide there.

A jet flew over late afternoon, I looked out of the window to check all the girls were out and OK and saw her then, but I was busy in the kitchen so didn't go out to see them. I am assuming that she was panicked at some point later on and ran for cover, hitting her neck in the process.

We hatched her out under Sweetiepie our Maran hen, just a year ago:-( and we have watched her grow up. She was a lovely, friendly hen, a rare breed Silver Dorking and with very funny little ways - like most Dorkings she would go broody at the drop of an egg, but she would also follow me around crooning at me and would jump up on my lap given half a chance.

Still, at least I know she died very quickly.

Violet, I shall miss you a lot... :-(



Violet just hatched out



With her sisters and Sweetiepie



Taking a ride on mum.



laying her first egg...

Sad news about Ginger

This is a hard post for me to write.

When Compostman went to let out the chickens this morning he found Ginger dead inside the Broody Ark, where she had been recouperating in isolation since the fox attack.

Yesterday she spent her second day outside with all the other chickens, running around, scratching around in the soil and generally being a normal hen. She still hadn't laid an egg since the fox attack, but she didn't look egg bound and shock can often stop a hen laying for some time. Also the hot weather has put a couple of the other girls off lay, so we were not worried about Ginger not laying. She looked absolutely fine when I shut her in at 9pm and at midnight Compostman checked on her and she crooned at him from her nest box.

Ginger wasn't injured in any way when he found her this morning, she looked as if she might have had a brief struggle (the bedding was churned up) but apart from that she had ..just...died. So we assume that perhaps she died of heart failure, possibly bought on by another egg in the process of developing, getting stuck overnight. Or, maybe, she just, died.

Ginger and Henny were the first 2 hens I got when I started keeping chickens again two and a half years ago, Compostman bought me an Eglu and Henny and Ginger as a birthday present.



We were all always very fond of Ginger, she was very clever and always keen to come and join in with what we were doing. She also seemed very bright for a chicken and would lead us over to gates she wanted opened...and she had a trick where she would jump up to get food from your hand.



Ginger the amazing jumping chicken! Her feet are around 2 foot off the ground in this photo.

Ginger spent yesterday re asserting her "top hen" status by getting first dibs at any tasty morsel of food and by re-enacting a "coldiz" style raid on the veg garden. She dug a tunnel under the wire and got inside the veg garden then encouraged some of the others through, to wreak a bit of havoc in there....





I tried to take a few pictures of her during the afternoon to show you all she was back in action, but she was too busy to pose for me.



SO, all very sad here and we buried Ginger on the edge of the wood today, near one of her favourite scratching spots.

RIP Ginger Hen, you will be much missed by all of us here at Compost Mansions.

15th April 1989

20 years ago today, my Mother died.

She had been in various Hospitals, Nursing Homes etc for the previous 17 years, having suffered the first of many many strokes in November 1972, during my first year at Grammar School. I was 10. I found her, I was alone in the house, gave her CPR and called an ambulance.

She was paralysed down her right side, had brain damage and lost her ability to speak, but by June 1973, after a long session in the excellent River mead hospital in Oxford, had recovered enough to live at home ( on the ground floor) to walk with a stick, could write with her left hand and had begun to learn to speak again. Her mental faculties were apparently unimpaired, for which we were all very grateful. Her doctors spoke of anticipating "a near full recovery".

Then she had suffered another stroke, on the eve of my last day at school in July 1973, and never recovered from it. She was standing at the gate watching me ride my pony and in the space of time it took me to put Periwinkle in the stable and walk up to where she was standing, she had another, major, stroke and by the time I got to her she was on the ground, unconscious.

I gave her (yet again) CPR and called an ambulance, but the damage was done. She suffered more than 20 further strokes in the next decade, each one eating away a bit more of her brain.

She spent the next 16 years in hospital (usually on geriatric wards) amongst very old, usually senile people ( she was only 48 when this happened but stroke victims are usually older....) and I visited her several times a week, more if she was closer to where I lived but sometimes less often if she had been moved to a hospital 20 miles away ( as happened between one visit and the next once, I turned up to see her and found she had gone that afternoon from Worcester to a new ward in Evesham...)

I won't go into the whole other story of my disintegrating relationship with my father during this time, his alcoholism and his throwing me out of my family home when I was 16, thus aborting my senior education and plans for a glitering Oxbridge degree for no good reason other than his alcoholism......but despite all this I kept on visiting MY MUM, because that's who she was, despite the paralysis, the inability to talk to me, the terrible surroundings, the soul destroying (for her and for me) nature of the geriatric wards she inhabited ( remember this was in the 70's and "Human Rights" and "Patient Dignity" were not buzzwords to "the management" The nursing staff were all wonderful but.....)

Mum attended my wedding and looked very happy to do so, she obviously approved of Compostman ( who wouldn't!) she showed lots of love and smiles whenever I went to see her (and oh however often I went, it NEVER felt like enough...)

but finally, her poor organs gave up the unequal struggle to cope with a semi paralysed body...and she died in the early hours of 15th April l989.

I was in the throes of my last week of revision for my University Finals for my Materials Science degree when this happened, I had been going to see Mum every day as she got ever weaker and I knew the end was near but still, it was a shock when the call came. I remember us going to see Mum in the early hours and after she died at 5 am coming home, in a numb state, to finally get to sleep late morning, and wake up at 3 pm, turn on the TV to see the Hillsborough disaster unfold in front of us on the TV screen.

The images I saw haunt me still. Coupled with my sad frame of mind and lack of sleep they took on an even more nightmarish quality which I can still clearly recall today.

I understand, to those who so tragically lost 96 loved ones at an innocent, pleasurable occasion like a Football match because of "officialdom", why this date is so sad and why the injustice still burns....

because I lost my Mum as well, today, 20 years ago, and whilst the circumstances are oh so totally and horribly and tragically different....we all lost loved ones on the 15th April 1989.

I can never forget this date. Nor should I. Nor should any of us.