Showing posts with label MAKING FUN OF MINORITIES SURE IS FUN. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MAKING FUN OF MINORITIES SURE IS FUN. Show all posts
Fwd: Fw: So how many illegals can fit into one car?
Do you remember the old circus clown car with ALL of the clowns in it? Count the number coming out of the trunk too!
So how many illegals can fit into one car? Take a guess and then watch the video.
https://twitter.com/philadper2014/status/1052730521061654529?lang=en
Fwd: FW: World Cup Refund!
World Cup refund...
After Nigeria was eliminated from the world cup the Nigerian captain personally offered to refund all the expenses of fans that traveled to Brazil. He said he just needs their bank details and pin numbers to complete the transaction.
Fw: Fluctuations
Today's word is ..................Fluctuations
(I will never hear or see this word again without thinking of this joke.)
I was at my bank today; there was a short line.
There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.
It was obvious she was very irritated.
She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said,
"Fluctuations."
The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"
You know you're laughing ....
Now pass it on .........
Fwd: FW: Dire Warning
This morning, the Muslim Brotherhood warned the United States that if the United States continued meddling in Syria, Egypt, Libya, Iraq, Turkey and other potential hot spots in the Middle East, they intend to cut off America's supply of 7-11 and Motel 6 managers.
If this action does not yield sufficient results, cab drivers will be next, followed by Dell, AT&T and AOL Call Center Customer Service Reps.
Finally, if all else fails, they have threatened to not send us any more Presidents.
It's gonna get ugly, people.
~~~~
Fwd: FW: No Waiting Time
MAGIC GREEN HAT
Earlier this year while on vacation to escape the snow and cold, I passed through Florida on my way to the Caribbean cruise.
The day after returning from my cruise, I wasn’t feeling very well and decided that I really needed some medical assistance... and decided to visit the emergency room at the closest medical facility.
Realizing that it would likely be very crowded and not wanting to sit there waiting for 4-5 hours to be seen, I put on my MAGIC GREEN HAT.
As soon as I entered the E.R., I noticed that over 3/4 of the people got up and left. I guess they decided that they weren't really that sick after all.
I believe that MAGIC GREEN HAT cut at least 3 hours off my waiting time. Here's a picture of my MAGIC GREEN HAT
It also works at the Dept. of Motor Vehicles. It saved me 5 hours.
At the Laundromat, three minutes after entering, I had my choice of any machine, many of which were still running.
If you live in Texas, it might cut your wait time at the grocery store as well.
But . . . don't try it at McDonald's. The whole crewran out the back door and I never got my order!
Fwd: FW: Mats
Subject: Mats
SUBJECT: INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITYThought you might want to consider getting on board early.
A German Engineer just started his own business in Afghanistan.
He's making land mines that look like prayer mats.
It's doing well.
He says prophets are going through the roof.
Fwd: FW: Wedding & Graduation Photos!!!!
Wedding & Graduation Photos!!!!
It must be wonderful to look back in years-to-come and recognize all your old classmates.. and the memories of all the fun times.
This is a very nice souvenir photograph of 24-newly wedded couples in Enfield, near London.
Just hope. for their sakes, that each husband goes home with the right tablecloth.
Fwd: FW: 3rd world space program?
Subject: FW: 3rd world space program?
This is one very cool rocket. Evidently the people in Thailand or Laos have been doing this stuff for hundreds of years. I love it when they light it and run like hell!!
Fwd: FW: Muslims (Jeff Foxworthy)
Muslims (Jeff Foxworthy)
You gotta love Jeff 
Oops, Can I say that?
Have you ever wondered why it's OK to make jokes about Catholics, the Pope, Jews, Christians, the Irish, the Italians, the Polish, the Chinese, the French (including French Canadians), the elderly, bad golfers, etc., but it’s insensitive to make jokes about Muslims? We need to level the playing field for the sake of political correctness... Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims: 1. If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor, You may be a Muslim. 2. If you own a $3,000 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes, You may be a Muslim. 3. If you have more wives than teeth, You may be a Muslim. 4. If you wipe your butt with your bare hand but consider bacon to be unclean, You may be a Muslim. 5. If you think vests come in two styles: Bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a Muslim. 6. If you can't think of anyone you haven't declared jihad against, You may be a Muslim. 7. If you consider television dangerous but routinely carry explosives in your clothing, You may be a Muslim. 8. If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs, You may be a Muslim. 9. If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four, You may be a Muslim. 10. If you find this offensive and don't forward it, You may be a Muslim.  |
Fwd: Fw: Fix It With a Hammer
Curator Note: This is a repeat from: Fw: Waco Times this is too good not to pass on. It has been updated/rewritten to: Our culture offends the freeloaders and is apparently from a 21 year old female who "gets it".
“IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM”
WRITTEN BY A 21 YEAR OLD FEMALE.
This was written by a 21 yr. Old female who gets it.. It's her future she's worried about and this is how she feels about the social welfare big government state that she's being forced to live in! These solutions are just common sense in her opinion.
This was a letter to the editor, in the "Waco Tribune Herald", Waco, TX.
PUT ME IN CHARGE . . .
Put me in charge of food stamps no cash for Ding Dongs or Ho Ho's, just money for 50-pound bags of rice and beans, blocks of cheese and all the powdered milk you can haul away. If you want steak and frozen pizza, then get a job.
Put me in charge of Medicaid. Then, we'll test recipients for drugs, alcohol, and nicotine. If you want to use drugs, alcohol, or smoke, then get a job.
Put me in charge of government housing Ever live in a military barracks? You will maintain our property in a clean and good state of repair. Your "home" will be subject to inspections any time and possessions will be inventoried. If you want a plasma TV or Xbox 360, then get a job and your own place.
In addition, you will either present a check stub from a job each week or you will report to a "government" job. It may be cleaning the roadways of trash, painting and repairing public housing, whatever we find for you. We will sell your 22-inch rims and low profile tires and your blasting stereo and speakers and put that money toward the "common good."
Before you write that I've violated someone's rights, realize that all of the above is voluntary. If you want our money, accept our rules. Before you say that this would be "demeaning" and ruin their "self-esteem," consider that it wasn't that long ago that taking someone else's money for doing absolutely nothing was demeaning and lowered self-esteem.
If we are expected to pay for other people's mistakes we should at least attempt to make them learn from their bad choices. The current system rewards them for continuing to make bad choices.
I love this one...
AND while you are on Gov't subsistence, you no longer can VOTE! Yes, that is correct. For you to vote would be a conflict of interest. You will voluntarily remove yourself from voting while you are receiving a Gov't welfare check. If you want to vote, then get a job.
Now, if you have the guts - PASS IT ON...I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO GET THIS BACK, IF EVERYONE SENDS IT, I WILL GET OVER 220 BACK!!! I WOULD KNOW YOU SENT IT ON!!!<god-bless-america.jpg>
Isn't it weird that in AMERICA our flag and our culture offend so many people......but our benefits don't?
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