So let us understand a few things:
So let us understand a few things:
12/28/2018 03:30:00 AM | Key Words: BARACK OBAMA, BILL CLINTON, Donald Trump, GEORGE H. W. BUSH, GEORGE W. BUSH, HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON, LIBERAL MEDIA, NATO, russia, Vladimir Putin | 1 Comments
Fwd: The latest series
Subject: The latestMerkel: "Mr. President. Let us lay it out for you: The only way our socialist countries can afford to prosperously support our populations' short work days, long vacations, and free medical attention is for the US to continue to foot the bill in the form of overpaying for NATO, the UN, the climate scam, plus a massive trade imbalance. If we don't continue to receive these forms of welfare from the US, our voters will not re-elect us!!”
6/26/2018 03:30:00 AM | Key Words: Donald Trump, EUROPE, GERMANY, GLOBAL WARMING, NATO, SOCIALISM, TRADE, WELFARE | 1 Comments
Fw: Threat Alerts
Subject: Threat Alerts
Fw: MEMO FROM THE SECURITY OFFICES
MEMO FROM THE SECURITY OFFICES-- The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666. The Scots raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards". They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line in the British army for the last 300 years. The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was thought to be precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability. However, it's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides Now". Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels. The Spanish are all terribly excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. |
2/02/2010 11:58:00 AM | Key Words: ENGLISH, FRANCE, NATO, TERRORISM | 8 Comments
Fw: FW: Cheerleader.
Subject: Fw: Cheerleader.
I WOULD SAY THAT SHE IS A CRACK SHOT (No Pun Intended) |
1/13/2009 08:15:00 AM | Key Words: AMERICAN SOLDIER, NATO, TALIBAN | 5 Comments
Fwd: Fwd: If Only it was this simmple [sic]
This would-be presidential speech forward was found by our regular contributer, Dana. This was sent in before, but here it glows passionately in full color text. Before you read this patriotic address, may I suggest you ready yourself by standing on your desk and clenching your fists? It should be proudly read it out loud, perhaps with a bull horn (if available). Important: Stomp your foot when it comes to the "thank a soldier" closer. THIS IS GREAT - IF ONLY IT WAS THIS SIMPLE... WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH? 'My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed. Yep, border security.
This marks the birth of a new MRWD key word: DARN TOOTIN.
-m
-----begin forward-----
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , Germany , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bonne chance, mes amies, Gl?ck meine Freunde, y?a?a mo? ?py?b?.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not ticking us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2 its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra thousand tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put'em?
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska- which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'darn tootin'.
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America .. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America .. Thank you and good night.'
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading this in English, thank a soldier.
6/13/2008 09:15:00 AM | Key Words: ALASKAN OIL DRILLING, AUSTRALIA, CANADA, CHINA, DARN TOOTIN, ENGLISH, FOREIGN AID, FRANCE, GERMANY, IRAQ, MEXICO, NAFTA, NATO, PRESIDENT, SOCIAL SECURITY, TERRORISM, U.N., U.S. BORDER | 6 Comments