The things you find on Reddit. Today's topic: Incels.

Here is the post.

Gee, no wonder these guys have a problem with women.

I first heard this term "Incel" when somebody used it to label me.

I quite literally had no idea what they were talking about, but I looked it up:

Incel: aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. incels have little to no self awareness; even when they see other "ugly" men with girlfriends, they consider these men to be tricksters who have somehow beat the system and can get women despite being cursed with unattractiveness (in other words, theyre respectful to women and women are attracted to their personalities, but incels cant comprehend such a phenomenon). they believe that women owe them sex, and many of the more extreme incels like to spend time in incel communities on the internet coming up with ways to make women have sex with them (often involving genocide of people of color, genocide of "Chads" (men who have sex), taking rights away from women, raping them, having sex with women's dead bodies, and other horrid, disgusting things. they cant understand that that is PRECISELY why women want nothing to do with them).

Okay, well there are plenty of derogatory things I could be called, that might actually reflect my character in some way, but this ain't it. 

Apparently that recent attack in Canada is being blamed on one of these losers.

Men hating on women is certainly nothing new, and this does nothing more than put a new label on an age old problem.

For the record nobody owes anybody sex, or even affection.

Those are things you earn.

And relationships, no matter how awesome they may begin, often end with hurt feelings and even outright anger.

I have certainly been there myself. 

But to hate on an entire gender just because you are unlucky at love, is certainly never going to convince that gender that you are worthy of their time or affection.

You have to try to be a better you, before you can expect others to be a better them.

Michelle Obama's portrait is so popular that the Smithsonian had to move it to handle the crowds.

We’re always changing things up here 👀 Due to the high volume of visitors, we’ve relocated Michelle Obama’s portrait to the 3rd floor in our 20th-Century Americans galleries for a more spacious viewing experience. Reubicamos el retrato de Michelle Obama al tercer piso del museo pic.twitter.com/OnBgmf6bQq

— Portrait Gallery (@NPG) March 9, 2018

Courtesy of The Root: 

Who wouldn’t want to go see the real first lady Michelle Obama, even if that meant “settling” for an amazing, intricate portrait rather than the real deal? 

As it turns out, everyone was just waiting to see the unique portrait Baltimore artist Amy Sherald painted of the former FLOTUS after it was unveiled at the Smithsonian’s National Portrait Gallery last month. 

So much so that the museum was forced to relocate the portrait because of the demand.

I am not so sure that it is the painting itself which draws so much attention, or that it represents one of the greatest First Ladies who has ever graced the White House.

We were so lucky to have them both.

BTW this is the message that the Obamas sent to those Parkland students.

EXCLUSIVE: Here’s the letter @BarackObama and @MichelleObama wrote to the #ParklandShooting survivors. In it, the former president and first lady tell the teens that they’ve “inspired” them, and commend them on “awakening the conscience of our nation.” https://t.co/FOQYVguNFw pic.twitter.com/xEPHE6iUL2

— Mic (@mic) March 21, 2018

Even out of office they are still supporting Americans and their quest to end gun violence.

Barack Obama once again showing us how it's done.

Happy Valentine’s Day, @MichelleObama. You make every day and every place better. pic.twitter.com/aWvyytR7Mm

— Barack Obama (@BarackObama) February 14, 2018

Look at that.

No sex scandals, no paid off porn stars, no publicly fighting over child custody.

Just love, pure and simple.

And it is a love which is clearly reciprocated.

Happy #ValentinesDay to my one and only, @BarackObama. To celebrate the occasion, I’m dedicating a little Valentine’s Day playlist to you! 💝 https://t.co/aHSQAL25mH

— Michelle Obama (@MichelleObama) February 14, 2018

Altogether now, "Awww!"

Not only was this a great President, but this is a great love story. 

I think that the next book Barack Obama should write is one about how to keep your marriage strong.

Barack and Michelle at their first and last state dinners.

Because clearly he knows the secret.

Let's end our day with a spoonful of Joe Biden, just to make us all feel a little better.

In emotional moment on @TheView, Joe Biden consoles Meghan McCain, whose father was diagnosed with same cancer Biden's late son Beau had. "There is hope. And if anybody can make it, your dad [can]." pic.twitter.com/tQUy11X5sV

— ABC News (@ABC) December 13, 2017

I am by no means a big fan of Meghan McCain, but she is a human being, and she is suffering.

Joe Biden demonstrates such abundant humanity in how he interacts with her, and his ability to even make her laugh while she is falling apart on national televisions speaks highly of the kind of heart our former Vice President possesses.

When Joe and Barack ran our country we were in many ways the best we have ever been.

They embodied the type of decency that we are sorely lacking these days. 

I miss them both, and know that whenever I share a story about what either one of them is up to these days that it will be both uplifting and hopeful.

In case you have forgotten this is how a REAL President comforts the families of fallen soldiers.

Here's President Obama in 2014 showing how a real Leader speaks to & comforts the family of a fallen soldier. ❤️🇺🇸pic.twitter.com/mYZBpwXV4O

— Ricky Davila 🇵🇷 (@TheRickyDavila) October 22, 2017

Compassion, empathy, and genuine affection for others.

The man never failed to demonstrate the very best of what it meant to be an American leader.

Let's take a moment away from all of this negativity to celebrate true love.

Happy 25th anniversary @barackobama. A quarter of a century later, you're still my best friend & the most extraordinary man I know. I 💕 you. pic.twitter.com/y0nevQmatB

— Michelle Obama (@MichelleObama) October 3, 2017

And not to be out done, this is Barack's message to Michelle via Facebook.

Yes, we miss them.

Probably more every single day.

But it is just nice knowing they are out there, still desperately in love, and still working to make the world a better place.

Barack and Michelle Obama's tweeted Valentine's Day messages to each other will end your day on just the right note.

Happy Valentine’s Day, @michelleobama! Almost 28 years with you, but it always feels new. pic.twitter.com/O0UhJWoqGN

— Barack Obama (@BarackObama) February 14, 2017

At almost the exact same time the former First Lady tweeted this.

Happy Valentine's Day to the love of my life and favorite island mate, @BarackObama. #valentines pic.twitter.com/n3tEmSAJRT

— Michelle Obama (@MichelleObama) February 14, 2017

You know I do not typically get jealous of other people, but these two......well damn who wouldn't want to have a love affair like this?

President Obama awarding Joe Biden the Presidential Medal of Freedom is the video we all deserve to see at the end of the day.

I swear that it seems that all President Obama wants to do these days is hit me right in the feels.

At this point I am just grabbing a box of tissues every time I see him step to the lectern.

You can literally FEEL the love between these two men, and watching them together is now like an antidote to the blues.

I am not going to bother telling you all that I am going to miss these two, because I think by this point we are all on the same page.

P.S. Here is Joe Biden's response after receiving this completely unexpected award. 

President Obama, the Father-in-Chief.

Courtesy of the Washington Post:

For Obama, one of the most welcome byproducts of gaining the highest office in the land at the age of 47 was that he could finally differentiate himself from his own absentee father, Barack Obama Sr., and become the child-centric parent he had always longed to be. This hands-on dad, who helped coach Sasha’s grammar school basketball team, puts a high premium on both connecting with and providing direction to his girls. 

As Obama has often said, the president “lives above the store” and has no commute. No longer has his hectic travel schedule required constant separations from his two girls. Malia was a summer baby — born on the Fourth of July in 1998 — and for the first three months of her life, Obama was glad to help his wife, Michelle, by changing diapers and rocking Malia to sleep. But once fall came, the state senator and part-time law professor had to be away from the family’s Chicago home at least half the week. And by early 2007, when he was both a U.S. senator and a full-time presidential candidate, Obama was forced to hand off just about all of the parenting responsibilities to Michelle. 

He was eager to reconnect with his family. Soon after being inaugurated, Obama established what New York Times reporter Jodi Kantor has called “an unusual rule for a president.” As he informed all his aides, he vowed to have dinner with his family five nights a week. That left just two nights a week for out-of-town fundraisers or dinners with fellow politicians. 

At 6:30, Obama and his wife sit down with the girls for a family dinner without any outsiders — not even Michelle’s mother, Marian Robinson, who typically retreats to her own “home” on the third floor of the White House. 

The evening meal, observed Obama’s former body-man Reggie Love, was treated “like a meeting in the Situation Room. There’s a hard stop before that dinner.” While aides sometimes call him back to work at 8:30 or 9, they rarely dare to go upstairs to bother him during the sacred dinner hour. 

On most days, Obama also eats breakfast with his daughters. And as part of his commitment to his girls, Obama has been reluctant to visit Camp David, since various school activities typically require the youngsters to be in Washington. In sharp contrast to his own neglectful father, this president with the perfect attendance record at his daughters’ parent-teacher conferences has emerged as a model father. 

Out of his own feelings of loss and alienation, which he described in “Dreams from My Father,” has come a road map for personal and social transformation. “I am a black man who grew up without a father, and I know the cost that I paid for that,” the president told a panel on Overcoming Poverty at the Catholic-Evangelical Leadership Summit held at Georgetown University in 2015. “And I also know that I have the capacity to break that cycle, and as a consequence, I think my daughters are better off.”

There are very few traits that I find as admirable as a man who prioritizes being a good father. 

Much like our President I am also the product of a broken homes and an absentee father, and I can admit that when I became a dad it was all consuming for me, and quickly made almost everything else seem insignificant by comparison.

There is no job more important in my opinion, not even the job of President of the United States.

So recognizing that the President feels the same way, only makes me admire him that much more.

New app will help Americans fleeing Donald Trump's America meet Canadians willing to help them start a new life, and new relationship, north of the border.

Courtesy of the Guardian: 

Maple Match is a matchmaking service like none other. In the words of its website, it “makes it easy for Americans to find the ideal Canadian partner to save them from the unfathomable horror of a Trump presidency”. The app, in other words, wants to help Trump-averse singles find love – and perhaps a new country to call home. At the moment, eager singles can sign up for early access when the dating app launches properly. And when it does, many thousands of unhappy Americans and generous Canadians will be paired.

Okay let's see;

"Middle aged loner, with rapier like wit, middling typing skills, and a love for politics. Seeks relatively attractive woman for long boring conversations about religion, frequent trips to the cinema, and brief yet exhilarating fumbling between the sheets. No weirdos, smokers, or secret Stephen Harper supporters need apply."

Yeah, I'm probably stuck here.

New study reveals that spanking increases childhood defiance and mental health issues.

Courtesy of Red Orbit: 

If you think that the answer to an unruly child is a good spanking, think again, say researchers from the Universities of Texas and Michigan, who after extensive analysis found that this form of punishment only makes youngsters more likely to be defiant and aggressive. 

Their study, which was published in the April edition of the Journal of Family Psychology, was based on five decades worth of research involving more than 160,000 children. They are calling it the most extensive scientific investigations into the spanking issue, and one of the few to look specifically at spanking rather than grouping it with other forms of physical discipline. 

“Our analysis focuses on what most Americans would recognize as spanking and not on potentially abusive behaviors,” lead author Elizabeth Gershoff, an associate professor of human development and family sciences at the University of Texas, said in a statement Monday. “We found that spanking was associated with unintended detrimental outcomes and was not associated with more immediate or long-term compliance, which are parents' intended outcomes when they discipline their children.” 

In fact, Gershoff and co-author Andrew Grogan-Kaylor, an associate professor at the University of Michigan School of Social Work, found that the more frequently that children are spanked, the higher the risk that those kids will start to defy their parents, become aggressive, experience mental health issues, exhibit anti-social behaviors, and/or develop cognitive difficulties. 

In the mental health field this is really old news, but you would be surprised at the number of people who still feel that all any unruly or disruptive child needs is more discipline. And of course their idea of discipline always involves corporeal punishment.

Let me confess that when I was a young father I did swat my daughter on the butt one or two times at least.

My only excuse is that I was not well educated enough to know the harm I was doing and I now regret every swat I ever administered to my child.

And trust me she remembers every one of them as well, and will bring it up to remind me that I was not always the cool headed professional that people think I am today.

The problem of course is that positive behavior modification techniques are still not widely known, and even when known take time to change disruptive behaviors, while for many parents the spanking creates immediate gratification both by temporarily altering the child's behavior and also feeding into the parent's sense of power and need for control.

However if parents choose the slower path of positive behavior modification they will end up with happier children and ultimately more successful adults.

A little perspective.

My mother spent the night at my house the other night, because she did not want to drive back to Palmer in the dark.

While here she brought up the topic of religion and we had a long talk about my atheism and her very basic brand of faith.

I played for her Professor Neil DeGrasse Tyson's Most Astounding Fact, and explained how understanding that the entire universe, and everything in it, shared the same DNA if you will was both humbling and exhilarating, and how I saw the fables of religion as interfering with our understanding and acceptance of that simply truth.

She seemed to understand but also said that her faith gave her comfort, and she was worried that I would strip her of it just to make an intellectual point.

I said that I had no intention of doing that, and that at her age there was no reason for her to abandon her faith, so long as she was on guard against those who would use it to manipulate her or take advantage of her.

In the end it seemed that she understood me a little bit better, and that I certainly have no intention of doing anything that takes something away which gives her comfort and a sense of peace.

As I come to the end of this post it suddenly dawns on me that what I have written has virtually nothing in common with what is printed on that image up above.

Oh well it's my blog, and if think a story about a conversation with my mother about religion, and a Carl Sagan quote about the insignificance of human conflict are connected in some way, well so be it.

Muslim woman posts about daughter's fear that Donald Trump will "kick" them out of the country. Former and current military members respond with #IWillProtectYou.

That simple statement from a mother trying to comfort her child attracted the attention of hundreds of people.

One of those people was Army vet Kerri Peek:

Her request to veterans and active duty military members received quite a number of responses:

No one should be scared to live in a country because of their faith. #Sofia #iwillprotectyou pic.twitter.com/KjiBKrhh0D

— Bryan™ (@bryanchasebrown) December 22, 2015

After hearing a story of a Muslim child fearing she'd be taken from her home I was heart broken #iwillprotectyou pic.twitter.com/s83jt1kj4S

— Shannon (@shannon_cregan) December 22, 2015

Sofia, fear not. Good will always protect the innocent. Father of two daughters, Veteran. #iwillprotectyou pic.twitter.com/xhWJQI6mqm

— Simon Salt (@simonsalt) December 22, 2015

And there were more.

You see THAT is the country that we live in.

People like Donald Trump don't understand that.  Which is why they can NEVER be its leader.

H/T to Addicting Info and THV 11.

Precious moment between father and son in wake of terrorist attacks in Paris.

You know I like to consider myself pretty much a badass, but this did me in completely.

Some people are born to be parents.

And that guy is certainly doing it right.

Same sex marriage is now legal in Ireland. And progress takes another step forward.

Courtesy of the BBC: 

Same-sex marriage has now become legal in the Republic of Ireland, after new legislation came into effect on Monday. 

The law was passed after a referendum in May, when the Irish state became the first in the world to legalise same-sex civil marriage by popular vote. 

It is not yet known when and where the first same-sex wedding will be held. 

But the first people to be affected are same-sex couples who have already wed legally abroad. Their marriages are now automatically recognised by the state.

Of course the Catholic church, and other Christian organizations, had  campaigned hard against this new law, but ultimately they could not stand in the way of progress and acceptance.

Very happy for Ireland, and even more so for the many LGBT folks who will no longer have to feel like second hand citizens.

These are exciting times indeed.

Just something to keep in mind.

Approximately 1,500 Mormons stage mass resignation in response to rejection by church of children with same sex parents.

Source

Courtesy of CNN:  

About 1,500 Mormons are resigning from the Church of Latter-day Saints to protest a new policy that labels same-sex couples apostate and bans children of same-sex relationships from being baptized, a lawyer said Saturday. 

Attorney Mark Naugle said church members who want to resign brought the letters to his office on Saturday. 

"We had an incredible turnout," he said. "I was slammed for three hours. Some people stood in line for an hour and a half." 

Naugle said he plans to deliver the letters on Monday. 

A call for mass resignations call started about a week ago, when the LDS church released new guidelines for lay leaders known as "Handbook 1." 

One policy prohibits the "natural or adopted" children of parents in same-sex relationships from receiving a name and a blessing in a ceremony performed by the Mormon priesthood, according to the handbook.

Well I think this signifies yet another step forward for those of the Mormon faith.

The church has been losing members since their involvement with Prop 8 in California came to light, and it looks like their anti-gay positions continue to cost them dearly.

This is how a religious organization's ethics and morals change.

Morality does NOT come from within the religion, it is foisted upon it by changing societal attitudes.

Suspect in Mississippi university shooting takes his own life. Motive for shooting may have been jealousy.

Mississippi shooter Shannon Lamb.

Courtesy of Fox News: 

An instructor at Mississippi's Delta State University suspected of killing the woman he lived with and a colleague -- possibly as the result of a love triangle -- died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound late Monday, authorities said. 

Local media, citing the Washington County Sheriff's office and other agencies, reported that Shannon Lamb, 45, was being chased by police in his black Dodge Avenger on Highway 1 near Greenville when he pulled the car over, bailed out on foot, and ran into some woods along the side of the road. Lamb had earlier spoken to police, telling them "he's not going to jail." 

Delta State University police chief Lynn Buford told the Associated Press that the pursuing officers heard a single gunshot before finding Lamb wounded. The suspect was taken to a local hospital where he was pronounced dead.

....

Police believe that hours before Lamb shot and killed Schmidt, he murdered his domestic partner, 41-year-old Amy Prentiss, at the home the couple shared in Gautier, Miss., approximately 300 miles from Delta State's campus in Cleveland. 

Lamb, a geography and social science education instructor, allegedly believed Prentiss was also in a relationship with Schmidt. However, authorities early Tuesday declined to formally identify a motive for the crimes.

I said in an earlier post that the majority of the shootings that take place in this country have NOTHING to do with self defense and are usually the result of depression or anger.

However I obviously left out one motivation...jealousy.

These shootings were not due to mental illness as so many pro-gun folks would have us believe.

They were carried out by an intelligent, well educated individual who was temporarily unable to deal with his emotions.

Without an available weapon this would likely have been a case of one man punching another in the face. Everybody would have lived to someday put the incident behind them.

But when guns are readily available all it takes is one bad day, one bad hour, one bad minute, and everything changes forever.

Can't we just keep him?

Today marks the President's last day up here in Alaska.

And the guy has been having a blast, while also learning a lot of important information about how climate change is impacting our state.

Watch President Obama get behind the camera next to a glacier in Alaska's Kenai Fjords National Park to show you the serious impacts of climate change: http://go.wh.gov/GsxVga #ActOnClimate
Posted by The White House on Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Not only that but MOST of the people really like him up here.

And he's even made some new friends.

And it's not like he can't get things done while he's up here.

Not only that but the fish like him so much up here that one of them could not hold it together.

I'll tell you what, I will gladly trade our two Senators Lisa Murkowski and Dan Sullivan, PLUS  Rep. Don Young, AND any two Palins of your choosing, if you all will just let the guy stay up here permanently.

I mean come on, that's a good trade.

Okay well not a good trade, but a reasonable trade?

No you're right, that trade sucks.

Well maybe, just maybe, once President Obama leaves office he will consider coming back for a longer visit.

I am sure he will always be welcome.

Despite what some on our lunatic fringe might want him to believe. 

Perhaps the only Sunday school class I would attend voluntarily.

Courtesy of Raw Story:  

Larger-than-usual crowds of well-wishers meant former President Jimmy Carter had to teach an extra Bible class at his rural Georgia church and a local schoolhouse on Sunday, after he announced on Thursday cancer had spread to his brain. 

Carter, 90, a lifelong Baptist and church deacon, has taught Sunday school for decades, and the Maranatha Baptist Church in Plains, Georgia, is used to a throng. 

The church’s website asks people to line up before 9:00 a.m. and attend an orientation before the 10 a.m. class. 

The theme of the lesson was love, Carter told the 300 people who filled the church’s sanctuary, after briefly alluding to his health. 

“We are studying the most important aspect of Christianity,” he said, and read from the Sermon on the Mount in the Book of Matthew: “I say to you love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”

The article goes on to say that Carter taught a second Sunday school lesson so that those who could not attend the first were not left out. And then afterward he posed for pictures with well wishers for over half an hour.

You know along with the great Fred Rogers, Jimmy Carter is one of those people who literally embodies his Christian teachings.  Mr. Rogers was also a Sunday school teacher, and by EVERY account was as wonderful in private as we was on TV.

Jimmy Carter is also a great example of Christianity done right.

It really is too bad that there are so many out there using Christianity as an excuse to hate, or as camouflage to cover for their bad intent.

If there were more Jimmy Carters (And of course Mr. Rogers) serving as examples for their faith in the world, I bet there would also be fewer Christians leaving the fold.

And remember, this is an Atheist saying that.