Anchorage broke another record for snow. Well actually for the LACK of snow.

It's official! #Anchorage officially sets lowest seasonal snowfall record with 25.1" for 2014-2015. #akwx pic.twitter.com/bjZCj4tmN3

— NWS Anchorage (@NWSAnchorage) July 2, 2015

Courtesy of Alaska Dispatch: 

The outcome hasn't been in doubt for awhile, but on Wednesday, the National Weather Service made it official: The winter of 2014-15 was the least snowy on record for Anchorage. 

For record-keeping purposes, snowfall seasons end June 30. The following day, the weather service announced the new record -- 25.1 inches for the season -- in a public statement. That's about 5 inches less than the previous record set more than 50 years ago, in the winter of 1957-58 when only 30.4 inches fell. 

A chart tweeted out by National Weather Service Anchorage shows this year's record low snowfall was only about a third of the normal seasonal snowfall of 74.5 inches.

But remember folks, global warming is a liberal myth. 

It looks like Sarah Palin has been lurking here on IM again. Update!

So just a few hours ago I posted this about Palin's kind of backhanded recognition of Track and Tig's birthdays.

Well no sooner had I left for the grocery store to buy my liberal wine and cheeses, when what should suddenly pop up over on Palin's Facebook page:

Just look how happy the boys are to be involved in this photo-op.

Celebrating the boys' birthdays – in new snow on 4/20! Trig takes another lap on his restored '88 Élan (thank you, Garret and Ellie!) while enjoying this "climate change" (also known as "seasons"). 

See? You can tell how important this celebration was to Palin by the obvious effort she put into having somebody shlep to the store to buy cupcakes, and to dig up some left over candle to jam into the middle of one of them.

But what's up with that mention of climate change?

Oh wait, there's more.  

100% Human-Caused Global Warming? What a racket. A money-making, politically-driven tool that ignores history to enable control freaks' mandates that fundamentally transform your lifestyle and stall American progress. 

Well, happy birthday, sons; may you and your generation never cave to Al Gore and his liberal idiotic ilk as elitists pretend to play God, claiming they control Mother Nature. They can't predict this afternoon's weather but foolishly demand trust in their supernatural power to predict it 5000 years from now. Stay strong, boys! We need men like you to un-do what's been done to our country under liberal control. Meanwhile, enjoy the snow! 

- Sarah Palin 

And here's a picture of Trig playing in the snow, to drive home her point.

So not only is she late, but she simply cannot resist turning the post into an attack on Al Gore, the science behind Climate Change, and liberals.

However besides confusing weather with climate, Palin also must not have been in the state long enough to recognize that virtually ALL of us have been discussing how crazy this winter has been.

In fact this has been the second lowest snowfall on record.

But the real crime here is that Palin cannot simply wish her children a happy birthday without dragging politics into it. First yesterday with the whole Taya Kyle thing, and now today with her unprovoked attack on Al Gore.

What a small, sad, hateful woman.

If she doesn't knock it off I'm not going to let her come here anymore to learn what she is doing wrong. I'm serious.

Update: Oops I forgot to add this video of Trig at school from Willow.

Iraqi man shot dead while taking pictures of the first snowfall he has ever seen. Because you know, Texas.

Courtesy of Yahoo News:  

A man who just recently moved to Dallas from Iraq was shot dead as he was taking photos of the first snowfall he had ever seen, police said. 

Authorities are investigating the death of Ahmed Al-Jumaili, 36, who was killed in the parking lot of an apartment complex late Wednesday night. 

Al-Jumaili only moved to America three weeks ago, according to a fundraising page set up by friends. 

The Dallas Police Department said that the shooting took place at 11:40 p.m., when Al-Jumaili and his wife were taking photos of the snow. 

He was transported to a nearby hospital, where he died. According to ABC affiliate WFAA, witnesses told police that a group of men randomly started firing a gun and some nearby cars were also hit. 

Crimestoppers offered $5,000 for information that leads to an arrest.

And here I bet that this man believed he was leaving the dangers of Iraq for the safety of America.

I guess somebody forgot to tell him about Texas. 

Second quote of the morning.

Courtesy of The Boston Globe: 

As Boston is crushed under more than eight feet of snow, with the city’s all-time record just a few frigid inches away, the people of Anchorage 3,372 miles away can also unequivocally say, “We’ve never seen a winter quite like this.” 

As of Friday, less than an inch had fallen here in February. The joke on the streets is that the two cities have swapped winters. 

“You give us your snow, and we’ll give you the Palins,” said Nina Walker, the manager of a downtown gift shop called Once in a Blue Moose.

That pretty much sums up the opinion of the Palins by the vast majority of my fellow Alaskans. 

Hell speaking for myself I would gladly trade them for just one snowflake, and still think I came out ahead on the deal.  

Sen. James Inhofe "disproves" climate change by throwing a snowball on the Senate floor.

Courtesy of The Hill:  

Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Okla.) threw a snowball on the Senate floor Thursday in an effort to disprove what he sees as alarmist conclusions about man-made climate change. 

Inhofe, chairman of the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works, said the snowball was from outside in Washington, which he used to argue against claims that the earth’s temperature is rising due to greenhouse gas emissions. 

“In case we have forgotten, because we keep hearing that 2014 has been the warmest year on record, I ask the chair, do you know what this is,” Inhofe said to Sen. Bill Cassidy (R-La.), who was presiding over the Senate’s debate, as he removed the snowball from a plastic bag. 

“It’s a snowball. And it’s just from outside here. So it’s very, very cold out. Very unseasonable.” 

He then warned Cassidy before throwing the snowball at him.

Well hell I guess I stand corrected. I mean who could argue with logic like that?

I will assume that sometime this week Sen. Ted Cruz will show up on the Senate floor with a chimpanzee to disprove the theory of Evolution.

Three hours after my post this morning Sarah Palin weighs in on the unusual snowfall and, and of course, uses it to demonstrate her ignorance.

"C'mon Bristol, let's you and me hunt up a new wig fer yer momma!"

Courtesy of the Wasilla Wendigo's Facebook page:

 One last blast of Alaska winter today, hopefully? This is what "Grad Blast" means in Alaska! We'll move our graduation b-b-q indoors and watch the mini-blizzard from 'round the fireplace. (Global warming my gluteus maximus.)

First off let me just say how impressed I am that she had somebody look up the Latin term for "butt." (Now she knows why we sometimes refer to her as ole "Glute head.")

However she should stick to looking up new words and NOT attempt to try her hand at understanding science. Of course if she did, she might, just MIGHT, recognize that there is a vast difference between climate and weather. (Of course I am being facetious here as the idea of Sarah Palin puzzling out ANYTHING is ridiculous on its face.)

After all how idiotic do you have to be to think that just because there is a snowfall that it disproves Global Warming?

Oh yeah, that's right!

P.S. By the way lady get your OWN ideas for posts in the future and stop stealing from me.

A second helping of snowy Alaska.

My friend Dennis Zaki noticed my sad little I-Phone pictures from this morning and figured I needed a little help, photography wise.

Here some pictures he took today out in the Valley.

Well sure, everything looks better when you shoot it in focus.

By the way most of that early morning snow has already melted away, but I have little doubt that it will be back very, very soon.,

Seriously Alaska? WTF?

Okay so I woke up this morning to my daughter coming home at 5:30 a.m. after driving her drunken co-workers home last night. (She is a nondrinker and therefore always tapped to be the designated driver.)

First she says "Good morning Dad," quickly followed by "Have you SEEN what is going on outside?"

Well I was just then sipping my first cup of coffee, so no I had not seen what was happening outside as I was still not completely sure what was happening directly in front of me.

So I looked.

Gryphen front porch

Crappy cell phone picture of Gryphen front yard featuring denuded, snow encrusted, tree.

Gryphen back yard. Well at least you can no longer see the dog poop!

Okay what the actual fuck, Alaska?

I had to check my calendar three times just to make sure I was the appropriate amount of freaked out about this. Yep, it is ONLY September 29th!

Again, WTF Alaska?

Okay you know we do get early snowfalls. Usually around the end of October. But never this early, right?

I know that because I live here. And also because it is part of my childhood trauma.

Here let me explain, you see when I was a little boy I wanted to dress up like Spider-man, because you know Spider-man was the shit.

However we were pretty poor, so my mom tried to talk me into dressing up as something she could put together from items around the house. You know like a hobo, or a ghost, or a little boy whose heart was broken because he could NOT be Spider-man!

Anyway after I whined the sufficient amount and promised to eat my vegetables (Yeah right!) and clean my room (Never happened!), she caved in and bought me a cheap ass Spider-man costume at Woolworths.

And let me just tell you that I looked EXACTLY like Spider-man! (YOU know if Spider-man had been a hyperactive little midget, with a speech impediment.)

I loved the hell out of that costume and wore it to bed, at the dinner table, and even tried to wear it to school but my mother stopped me because apparently she did not want me to be the most awesome kid on the playground. (Mom was always holding me back like that.)

So after two weeks of waiting it was FINALLY Halloween, and I was so amped up I was crawling on the walls even without web-shooters. (Which this cheap ass costume did not have, even though it was an obviously imperative accessory.)

However when I woke up, you guessed it, we had snow.

A butt load of snow.

In response my mother made one of those executive decisions that all kids dread, and told me it was now too cold and that I would have to wear my Spider-man costume UNDER my snowsuit. Aaagghh!!!

Anyhow after some calm negotiations (Well essentially after fifteen minutes of my screaming and banging my head on the floor) we compromised. I COULD wear my Spider-man costume for all the world to see on the OUTSIDE of my snowsuit.

My throat was dry, I was having trouble breathing, and my head hurt like crazy, so I acquiesced.

However after my mother squeezed my snowsuited body into the costume I ended up looking like Spider-man with a serious pituitary problem. I was so bloated that I looked like a candidate for a superhero fat farm.

Well what could I do?  There was candy just waiting for me on the streets of Anchorage, so I "Spider-manned up" and went out to claim my booty.

Well to make a long story short (I know, too late right?) I ended up having one of the WORST Halloweens ever!  The snow was up to my knees, so my costume got drenched and started to fall apart. It was cold outside but hot inside my mask, so my face was sweating, and then the sweat was freezing to my cheeks. And to make matters worse my eye-holes got all frosty and I couldn't see where the hell I was going and kept wandering into traffic.

But possibly the worst thing was that I also could not see the top of my little orange pumpkin Halloween candy bucket and I kept missing it and dropping my candy in the fucking snow! And when I reached down to get my hard earned popcorn ball, the back of my costume split from crotch to hairline, and suddenly I was only a cool pudgy Spider-man from the front, and a sweaty little sobbing child from the back. Fuck that Halloween!

But I digress.

Really the important part of this post, is why in they hell is it snowing already?

“The earth has music for those who listen.” ― George Santayana

In Alaska on days like this which drain us of our vitality, and leave us empty and feeling inconsequential, it only takes a moment to cast our eyes upon the beauty that surrounds us to remind us that we are part of something amazing and breathtaking.

Despite what you might hear from some this place is not here to serve the needs of man, it is here to humble man with its presence, and inspire us to overcome our petty troubles and strive to achieve our potential.

At least that is how I have always seen it. And how it has always worked for me.

P.S. Yes these are also pictures from my friend the very talented Dennis Zaki.

Iditarod pictures from Dennis Zaki and heavy snow crushes a local church like a bug.

Dennis sent me these great photos of the start of the Iditarod yesterday. (The Anchorage start that is)

Four time winner Lance Mackey

I have not been sharing our weather woes with all of you, but this year is on track to be the snowiest winter in Anchorage history.

Yeah I know what you are saying, "But Gryph you live in Alaska what do you expect?"

Well I expect snow alright but this year it is fucking ridiculous!

There was SO much snow this year, and our plow trucks were so overworked trying to keep up, that my street did not get plowed for almost two months.  That's right TWO months!

In fact for awhile it was literally reduced to a one lane road, with eight foot snow drifts crowding us together. We actually had to dodge into each others driveways to let other cars drive past so that we could work our way out of the neighborhoods and onto the well plowed main roads beyond.

Anyhow, just in case you think I am whining, the other day my daughter came in all excited because one of the main roads leading to our neighborhood was closed off due to the roof of a local church collapsing.

Here is a picture I took of the remains of the church the other day as I drove home.

That church has been at that location since 1959, and the last expansion of the facility was in 1982.

I actually attended the Sunday School program at this church after I was kicked out of asked to leave my Episcopal church further up the road. But Abbott Loop was a Pentecostal church so you just KNOW I wasn't going to last long there. ("I'm sorry just did anybody actually SEE Jesus roll that rock back and leave the tomb? No I will not just shut up and eat my graham cracker!")

Anyhow that building has survived decades of snowfalls, but simply could not  make it through this winter in one piece.

I am not letting it get to me though. I mean spring has to come sometime, right?

Right?

A four hour power outage due to heavy snows. You gotta love Alaska!

After a morning of heavy snowfall, forecasters expect scattered snow showers tonight into Saturday morning in Anchorage. Police urged caution on city roads while Chugach Electric Association reports scattered power outages in the Hillside.

I have been going through withdrawals for the last four hours with no computer access, and nothing to do but try to get to the end of Sarah Palin's "Book of Lies".

Yeah because being without electricity was just not irritating enough.